Zip up your wetsuit, because “Sharknado 5” is coming soon and we’re freaking out over the cast of guest stars alone

Sure, the Discovery Channel’s Shark Week is legendary, but sometimes it’s just too educational. Where’s the fun in that? If you need your shark fix, do not fear: Sharknado 5 has a release date, and we have to admit, we’re very, very into it.

It’s not just a new Sharknado, either, but an entire Sharknado-themed week on SyFy. If you want to learn something about sharks, this might not be the week of televised shark movies for you. But it’s definitely going to be ridiculously good summer couch potato fare.

The whole week kicks off on Sunday, July 30th with a film called 5-Headed Shark Attack, which will be worth cranking the air conditioning and staying indoors alone. The shark-fest ends on August 6th with Sharknado 5: Global Swarming. 

You’re not going to want to miss this one. Beverly Hills 90210 alum Ian Ziering (hi, Steve!) will play “chainsaw-wielding leader Fin Shepard,” Tara Reid will play his bionic wife, April, and they will fight tooth to tail (we’re sorry for the shark puns) to save their son who gets caught in a sharknado and is swirled all over the world.

But it doesn’t stop there. Guest stars include Olivia Newton-John and her daughter, Chloe Lattanzi, as scientists helping to track the shark storm, Charo as the Queen of England, Porsha Williams as an archaeologist, along with other cameos from Bret Michaels, Clay Aiken, and Chris Kattan.

Did we mention that Fabio is going to be in Sharknado 5?

Yes, he is. And he’s playing the POPE.

Could this be any better? No, no it could not.

In addition to the release of Sharknado 5, Syfy’s other movies airing that week sound just as ridiculous-in-a-good-way.

There’s Mississippi River Sharks, which is, well, pretty self-explanatory. (Sharks take over the river and locals fight to stop them!) And Trailer Park Shark, also starring Tara Reid, along with Empire of the Sharks. Empire of the Sharks is, according to Entertainment Weekly:

“Set in a future where most of Earth is covered by water and the only land left is controlled by a warlord who rules with an army of hyper-intelligent sharks, unlucky humans are used as shark food. But when two friends risk their lives to rescue a trapped prisoner, those imprisoned decide to rise against their captor and his legion of bloodthirsty sharks.

Check out the full trailer just to get a taste of how intense the fifth Sharknado is going to be.

What’s  better than terribly amazing shark movies during the dog days of summer? Let us answer that for you: nothing. Not one darn thing.