Real-Life Lessons We Can All Learn From Yoncé

Bey. It only takes one syllable and suddenly a wave of ecclesial imagery floods your senses and floats you into sheer diva-like nirvana. You know what I’m sipping on (watermelon). She’s the pop-star poster child of feminism. She’s the female version of a hustler (DIVA). She’s an avid surfer, a roller girl, the epitome of a survivor, and absolutely #flawless. Don’t talk back ’cause she’ll send you to the left. Yes, we’ve gathered here today to speak about the Queen Bee herself, Beyoncé.

Since the release of Beyoncé’s self-titled album Beyoncé last November, we’ve been inundated with Yoncé, even more so than usual, to the point where it feels like she’s set up camp in the pop culture nook of our brains. First, the album drop. I literally can’t. Then the videos, the tour, the performances—it seemed as if the heavenly journey would continue forever on its ascent.

But then the tower-of-terror elevator incident transpired and we collectively learned that, without the bitter, the sweet ain’t as sweet. Talk of divorce swirls around the pages of every gossip site and it truly doesn’t look good. And then, last week’s VMAs, an answer (of sorts) to the gossip; her loving family seemingly intact, hugging, kissing, crying, on a stage before millions. Firmly established as a new feminist icon. The antidote to female objectification on the VMAs’ stage—Beyoncé showing the haters the door, heralded and worshipped again.

Who knows what is actually going on in her personal house— out of respect for the woman, I am not here to comment on the drama of her life. No, she’s given me too much. I am here instead to remind everyone of the reason that we bow down and worship the queen in the first place. Yes, that’s right, in these times of uncertainty, I think we should all take a look at the figure that is Bey; to look at the lessons she teaches, and her impact on us as a whole.

1. How to “keep it cute”

Yoncé has a doctorate in the “keep it cute” methodology (keeping it cute referring to: revealing as little as possible during a heated situation, not to, you know, being cutesy). She’s been keeping it cute for years. She’s the master of revealing nothing. Just watch her documentary, you finish the thing and realize that she fooled you into watching two hours of her life without telling you anything about her life. Ask any interviewer and they’ll tell you what a bore it is to interview Beyoncé. Not because she’s boring. Come on. No, because Yoncé doesn’t meddle in your business and she expects the same from you. One of the most famous people on the planet is also one of the most private.

So, after that elevator PR fiasco, you can just imagine the sticker smile that she has had to plaster on. But, she truly has managed to keep it cute throughout the whole situation. She’s regularly posting happily married pics of her and Jay on Instagram, she’s seen together with him hugging and kissing at basketball games and awards shows, they’re currently on tour, and she’s even managed to evade saying anything real about it even when rapping on her new remix with Nicki Minaj. And, good for her! I understand the desire for her to want to dictate her own public image and not allow the press to run her life. If it were me, I would be smiling and nodding too! I think we could all try and add some more couth into our everyday lives. From screaming through traffic, talking sh*t about an ex-boyfriend, or even appearing frazzled during meetings at work; the keep it cute method is a Beyoncé standard, and frankly, I need to keep it cute way more often, especially before I’ve had coffee.

2. What it means to be #Flawless

Because only Bey could drop an unannounced remix track with Nicki Minaj and laugh about the gossip surrounding her life by rapping, “Of course sometimes sh*t goes down when there’s a billion dollars on an elevator.” Indeed, Bey!

3. At the end of the day, it’s Me, Myself, and I

When she was a little girl performing for her friends and neighbors in her basement in Houston, Texas, Beyoncé charged $5 a ticket. That is self-respect. When you’re worth it, you know you’re worth it. If you’re mad we aren’t together anymore, then you should’ve put a ring on it. If you don’t respect me enough to be faithful to me, then you can see yourself to the left. Beyoncé preaches time and time again that it’s “Me Myself & I” at the end of the day. She values herself and pushes self-love all the time. Because Beyoncé knows that if you don’t respect yourself, nobody will respect you either.

4. When Yoncé say yes, nobody can say no!

Beyoncé is a powerful woman. She was on the cover of Time’s 100 Most Influential People this year. She was featured last year as well. She ranked #1 on the Forbes Celebrity 100 list this past year. Last year, she directed her own documentary about her life. And she’s now on tour with her husband co-headlining one of the most financially profitable tours of all time.

I mean, obviously BRAVO, but what does that mean for us mere mortals cast in her shadow? How does one emulate this type of power? Well, we can’t. Most of us are not going to be pop-star royalty in this lifetime, but we can learn from Beyoncé. For instance, I’m always trying to make myself seem smaller, I’m a modest person and am easily embarrassed by any praise or congratulations, and I think that’s true for a lot of people out there. What I love so much about Beyoncé, is that she isn’t afraid of her own abilities, her talent, her passion, her power. She respects them. When she is on stage commanding the attention of the audience, she isn’t wondering if she’s, “being too much.” Beyonce owns her power. She is not afraid of her greatness. How many of us look back and wish we could have realized how special we were when we were younger? Or how much we had going for us if we would have owned our confidence at the time. I don’t find fault in the fact that Beyoncé is proud of who she is and what she can do, I look up to her because of it. Her true power lies not in money or influence, but the knowledge and acceptance of who she is.

5. How to be the best in your field

Do you ever have that nagging feeling that although you tell everyone who’ll listen how “hard” you work, and how “busy” you are, you actually don’t work that hard at all? Beyoncé doesn’t. She’s been running this show since she was a tween and has accomplished more in her career by the time she was seven than I have in my time on Earth! When Bey decided that she was going to be a pop superstar, she and her father went from 0 to 100. FromVulture’s article about the queen:

Listen to the countless people who’ve worked with Beyoncé and the most common thread, the theme that unites all of their stories is that she is one of the most disciplined workers that they’ve ever encountered. And the truth is that her discipline and work ethic separates her from the pop-star pack. She will forever reign because she has sacrificed time, money, and energy, to be the best at her craft.

If you haven’t been able to tell thus far, then let me just say that Bey is one of my favorite entertainers. I love her. I love how she is constantly striving to be a better performer. To surprise us. To change and morph pop music. I love that she can sing and dance full-out AND at the same time. I love how in the “Blue” music video you can tell that she’s never been happier in her whole life. I love how her critics call her a robot, and yet “Jealous” is one of the most vulnerable and emotionally open songs I’ve ever heard. And I love that she is our nation’s, “reigning national voice.” So, yeah, sometimes when there is a billion dollars on a single elevator ride quibbles may arise. I don’t think any of us know how her personal life is going, and it’s none of our business anyway. But, I can tell you how her artistic life is going—flawlessly.

XO,

Your Gay Best Friend

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