Mandy Moore opened up about filming Jack’s devastating death scene, and she’ll break your heart all over again

There’s no question that Jack Pearson was the epitome of perfection. He’s a character we’ve all come to love and cherish, which is why his death on This Is Us was a momentous event in TV history and an incredibly catastrophic experience for many of fans. But while much of the attention has been on Jack, Pearson family matriarch Rebecca — and the actress behind her, the amazing Mandy Moore — should be highlighted, too.

For obvious reasons, This Is Us’ “Super Bowl Sunday” episode was almost unbearable to watch, so we can only imagine how tough it was for the cast to film it. Especially Mandy. Her character had to withstand extreme emotional turmoil while still displaying tremendous strength for the sake of her kids who had just lost their father.

Now that the big reveal about how Jack died is out, Moore has opened up about what it was like to film a string of emotionally brutal This Is Us scenes.

And, no joke, the details will break your heart all over again.

"That one was pretty gut-wrenching for me," she told Variety, referring to the hospital scene in which Rebecca sees a lifeless Jack. "Pretty much all of [episodes] 14 and 15, save for the happier moments, was a challenge — just because I feel like there has been so much build up that I wanted to honor these moments. I felt a tremendous responsibility to do that. I think I was just nervous. I wanted to make sure I could properly pour myself into those moments."

She also shared that she initially had no idea that Milo Ventimiglia was going to be there in that moment.

In effect, his unexpected presence added another dimension to her acting.

"I had no idea that [Milo] was going to be in that bed," she said, explaining that she thought their final conversation in the hospital would be it. "We filmed that scene, and then he was done for the day, obviously, because then he died. So I just was in my own frame of mind and had my headphones on and was preparing for that scene with the doctor and the candy bar and going into his room, but I was just preparing for an empty hospital bed."

"So I was shocked," she continued. "He was laying there, not moving, and it was very, very disturbing. We built this beautiful relationship, and we have this shared history now for the past two years, so it was a gut punch — both of these episodes."

Yep, we’re crying buckets of tears all over again.

Needless to say, the scene played out perfectly, and it’s a moment that will forever be embossed in our memory.

And, of course, we want to give Moore a big round of applause for the beautiful acting she continuously delivers on the show. And while we’re obvs still reeling from learning the details surrounding Jack’s death — will we ever recover? — we can’t wait to see what else This Is Us has in store for Bec.