The Exploration of Unemployment: O’ Christmas Tree

For this installment of exploring my unemployment options, I seem to have gotten caught up in the holiday spirit. Even though it still hasn’t really snowed where I live. Or gotten super cold yet. I haven’t even started listening to Christmas music. But, I’m here, waiting for Christmas like the rest of us and thinking how fun it would be to have a Christmas Tree farm.

Christmas Tree farms are probably a lot of work. Trees are notoriously slow growing plants, it’s not news. And I suppose you’d have to plant all different kinds of trees to satisfy everyone’s tastes: Douglas Firs, White Pines, Blue Spruces, etc. But, how awesome would it be to always be surrounded by that lovely smell of Christmas, even in the dog days of summer? I think it would be pretty cool. I’ve been to a few tree farms in my day and my favorites are the ones where you can see the progression of growth in the trees as you move farther and farther on your journey to find the perfect tree for all your ornament needs. Little saplings give way to tiny little Christmas trees that would fit in the smallest apartments, giving way to trees that are on their way to respectability and then those huge behemoths that look like they belong in museums or giant ornate mansions. Plus, the benefits are, you get to watch all sorts of happy families and couples come and pick out their perfect trees, sell them hot cocoa and help them build fun or crazy (depending on how well the quest goes) holiday memories.

Also fun: judging Christmas light contests. I love driving around in the evenings trying to find awesome light displays put up by neighbors and friends. It’s one of the highlights of the holiday season for me. I don’t like it when houses get to gaudy, though. Snoopy’s dog house…that’s just a turn off (although he did win first place by going commercial). Or when there are all different kinds of lights on one house, messing up the scheme. That’s why I think I’d be a good judge of light decorating contests. I can spot a light theme from miles away, and if it’s choreographed to music…extra points!  There are so many great ideas and decorations out there, it boggles my mind every year. Some of the most creative houses in my neighborhood come up with new, crazy ideas every year and out do themselves year after year.

I’d even be willing to sacrifice my waistline a little bit more and taste test anyone’s latkes before the Hanukkah season is over. Send ‘em over!