Every so often you see a shooting star of sass so bright that it blinds you with its brilliance. For instance, I am seriously in awe of this high school senior who sent a rejection of her rejection to Duke University, because as far as sass stars go, she just went full-on supernova. Like a lot of students at this tumultuous time of year, Siobhan O’Dell has been receiving word back from the colleges she applied to in the fall. Duke happened to be shortsighted enough to send her a rejection letter, but rather than wallowing, Siobhan immediately replied back with a letter so alternately brilliant and mind-boggling that I simply don’t see a way they could justify not letting her in.
Although the letter is clearly a joke, Siobhan deserves major props for triumphing over college admissions angst and channeling it into something this fun. College rejections suck and they can feel super personal even though they fully are not, as evidenced by the very impersonal letters we all received back from them. Siobhan’s took on the exact same impersonal tone in her reply, perfectly parodying the kind of talk I have come to refer to as Admissions Speak.
Here’s the letter that will have you snickering until the end of the semester:
Already the letter has gone viral enough that the teen is now set up to interview with the Duke Chronicle on Wednesday of this week. So is there a chance Duke will change their minds? Crazier things have happened. But they’re about to learn the meaning behind Anna Kendrick’s line”You’re gonna miss me when I’m gone,” because the teen has already said she’s leaning toward USC. Brace yourselves, students of USC — thanks to Siobhan, champion of rejecting rejections, your campus just got 1000% sassier.