Lilian Min
March 24, 2015 12:00 pm

“Uptown Funk” is the gift that keeps giving. Bruno Mars and Mark Ronson’s smash hit has been parodied/covered by literally everyone (no, seriously), and now it’s finally hit the fandom circuit.

YouTube user KFaceTV put together “Dark Lord Funk,” which shows the Death Eater crowd grooving and partying before their invasion of Hogwarts. Leading the dance and shimmying and shaking more than any evil person should be allowed to is an aviators-wearing Voldemort, maybe our favorite depiction of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named ever (sorry, Ralph Fiennes).

We’re having trouble deciding what’s our favorite part about the entire thing. Is it the fact that Voldemort wears curlers during the barbershop scene? That the python he’s holding is named Snape? That the entire song was rewritten with Harry Potter-specific lyrics? We’re definitely going to have to go with the last point: “Fill my goblet, put some fire in it” is just one of the amazing HP-specific lines.

With almost 500,000 views in a day, “Dark Lord Funk” proves that literally everybody loves “Uptown Funk” and Harry Potter and especially when they’re put together. Given how catchy and universally loved the song is, it’s just a matter of time before we get even more pop culture parodies — Doctor Who, The Walking Dead, The Hunger Games, I’m looking at you. Fandom, the bar has been set; don’t let us down.

Lyrics:
This Wiz, I’m ice cold
I’m Voldemort, That white gold
This one, for that H.P.
Says he hates me,
But what can he do?
Caught the kid, boy who lived
Harry’s outta luck
With the Elder wand, stop the chosen one
Maybe make a new horcrux? (Ha!)

I’m too hot (hot hand)
Call an Auror up to try and stop this man
I’m too hot (hot hand)
Make a headmaster retire man
I’m too hot (hot hand)
Don’t say my name, you know who I am!
I’m too hot (hot hand)
Am I bad ‘bout this curse,
Avada down now

Albus sent ya, hallelujah (Whoo)
Albus sent ya, hallelujah (Whoo)
Albus sent ya, hallelujah (Whoo)
Cuz Dark Lord Funk gon’ give it to ya!
Cuz Dark Lord Funk gon’ give it to ya!
Cuz Dark Lord Funk gon’ give it to ya!
Saturday night and we takin Hogwarts
Don’t believe me, just watch! (Come on!)
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Hey, Hey, Hey, Oh!

Stop!
Wait a minute
Fill my goblet, put some fire in it
Grasp the hands, make the vow
Come on ‘Trix, seal this now!
We takin Diagon, Nocturn, Hogsmede, anywhere!
If we show up, we gon’ curse out
Badder than that Devil’s Snare (Ha!)

I’m too hot (hot hand)
Call an Auror, try and stop this man
I’m too hot (hot hand)
Make a headmaster retire man
I’m too hot (hot hand)
Witch, say my name, you know who I am!
I’m too hot (hot hand)
Am I bad ‘bout this curse
Crucio now

Albus sent ya, hallelujah (Whoo)
Albus sent ya, hallelujah (Whoo)
Albus sent ya, hallelujah (Whoo)
Cuz Dark Lord Funk gon’ give it to ya!
Cuz Dark Lord Funk gon’ give it to ya!
Cuz Dark Lord Funk gon’ give it to ya!
It’s Saturday night and we takin Hogwarts
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Hey, Hey, Hey, Oh!

Before we leave
Imma tell Harry Potter a lil’ somethin
Dark Lord Funk you up, Dark Lord Funk you up
Dark Lord Funk you up, Dark Lord Funk you up
I said Dark Lord Funk you up, Dark Lord Funk you up
Dark Lord Funk you up, Dark Lord Funk you up

Come on, curse! Just cast it,
If you got the mark, then blast it
If you’re pureblood, we’ll have it,
No need to fear the dark magic!
Come on, curse! Just cast it,
No need to fear the dark magic,
Saturday night and we takin Hogwarts,
Don’t believe me, just watch! (Come on)
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Don’t believe me, just watch!
Hey, Hey, Hey, Oh!

Dark Lord Funk you up, Dark Lord Funk you up (Say Whaa!?)
Dark Lord Funk you up, Dark Lord Funk you up
Dark Lord Funk you up, Dark Lord Funk you up (Say Whaa?)
Dark Lord Funk you up, Dark Lord Funk you up
Dark Lord Funk you up, Dark Lord Funk you up (Say Whaa?)

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