Is it ungrateful/evil/bitchy to wish your significant other was better at gift-giving? Maybe, but this is a safe place where we can admit to ourselves that more often than not, when it comes time to getting holiday presents, it would be easier if we could just shop for ourselves. No matter how well your partner knows you, do they know you’ve been eyeing champagne-flavored gummy bears? Or that, for some reason unbeknownst to everyone including yourself, you feel like pairing everything you own with velvet scrunchies? Or that a beauty supplement called “Beauty Dust” exists and you’re not sure if it works, but you want to sprinkle it in your coffee anyway? Or that you just really, really want to try Rihanna’s new red lipstick just because?
Probably not, because your S.O. can’t fucking read minds, which is okay. So, this holiday season, instead of waiting for your boo to get you something you feel lukewarm about and either keep it out of guilt or wait in long-ass post-holiday lines to return it for something you’ll actually like, why don’t you just tell them what you want? Less romantic, I know, but far more efficient. You can send your S.O. shopping links, or you can send them this, a curated guide of stuff you actually want, stuff for a self-care Sunday night, or just a really pretty dress only you (or your resident HG editor) could pick out.
Remember that relationship column Cosmopolitan ran that was really meant to be seen by “your man” (soo heteronormative, but bear with me). Literally the page said “Show this to your man!” and you were expected to rip it out and leave it on his bedside table so he could study up on how to actually give you an orgasm, or introduce you to his mother. That doesn’t exist anymore, since we’ve grown past that as a society (it’s also just a weird and passive aggressive thing to do), but if you’ve been struggling with his/her gift-giving skills, send this link to them so that this year, you’ll actually be excited to open presents.
Or, you know, buy all this stuff yourself, for yourself, because you’re a badass bitch who deserves it.
1 Embroidered “No Drama Club” Patch, Bando, $7
Pretend you’re in 9th grade again (but this time, you take no shit), and iron this on your fave backpack or pair of jeans.
2 Baby Champagne Bears, Sugarfina, $8.50-$45
These don’t actually taste like champagne, but rather, a subtle mix of fruit. But if you want, and I totally suggest this, drop a handful in your glass of champagne. *Clinks glass*
3 Bourgeouise Sauvage Sweatshirt, Clare V., $125
I own this sweatshirt, and I feel like the chicest girl in L.A. when I wear it. It also just makes me giggle.
4 Sleepy Body Lotion, Lush, $9.95-$19.95
This lotion WERKS (and smells so, so good). Slather it on your arms, legs, and temples, feel yourself grow very, very sleepy.
5 Gold Cat Ear Ring, Etsy, $26
I’m big on playful rings and cat-themed things, so this ring has been on my radar.
6 Velvet Hair Scrunchie Set, Urban Outfitters, $12
Scrunchies are back, haven’t you heard?
7 Jasmin 17, Le Labo, $180
Le Labo is the perfume I imagine Alexa Chung spritzes behind her ears before she dashes out the door to have black coffee with ex Alexander Skarsgard.
8 InnoGear Aromatherapy Essential Oil Diffuser, Amazon, $17.95
This is the secret to an eight-hour sleep cycle.
9 PMS Ease Essential Oil, Eden’s Garden, $8.95
I love Eden’s Garden essential oils because they’re affordable and sell synergy blends like “Stress Relief” (my fave) and “PMS Ease” (adding to my cart now because I need some PMS ease for real).
10 Stunna Lip Paint by Fenty Beauty, Sephora, $24
According to basically every woman with a mouth, this liquid lip is to die (and lasts all day long without dehydrating your pout).
11 Alpine Sheepskin Mocassin, Minnetonka Moccasins, $55.95
I was born and raised in Minnetonka, so I have a special fondness for Minnetonka Mocassins. They’re comfier than Uggs (yes, I said it, fight me).
12 Petal Candle, Boy Smells, $29
I’m very specific about my candles, and I’m sure you are, too. They completely set a mood, so you want to make sure the smell and feel is right. This dainty floral candle is earthy without being snotty about it, and it ties a room together nicely.
13 Zea Leggings, endlæss, $60
Something most dudes (in my experience) will never understand? The power of a comfortable, sturdy pair of leggings. These leggings from L.A. boutique endlæss are handmade and tuck in all the stuff you want tucked in.
14 S’ip by S’well 16oz Seal the Deal Stainless Steel Portable Travel Mug, Target, $24.99
Feel adorable as you sip on coffee on your way to work. I mean, those seals, though.
15 I’m Real 5-Pack Sheet Mask Combo Set #4, Tonymoly, $15
Most luxurious feeling, ever? Getting home from work on a Friday, slapping on a sheet mask, lighting a candle, and pouring a glass of whatever makes you give not a single fuck.
16 Quote Couture Earrings, Modcloth, $9
I love punctuation.
17 Fried Chicken USA Sweatshirt, KFC, $76
Raise your hand if you live in the United States of Fried Chicken.
18 Gonna Be OK Tote, Bando, $25
Just looking at this tote makes me feel better. Bonus: It’s roomy.
19 The Cat’s Meow Shirt, Family Affairs, $140
This is the button-up shirt you wear when you want to feel like a boss but also feel like deeply yourself. I just bought myself one.
20 Je Jous Mimi Soft vibrator, Babeland, $95
Self-sufficient sexy time? Check.
21 Bexley Red Throw, Crate & Barrel, $39.95
How much do you want to wrap yourself in this gorgeous, red throw and turn on old episodes of Gilmore Girls?
22 Cereal Bowl White Chocolate & Cereal bar, Compartes, $9.95
Compartes has endless flavors of chocolate, but this one will always be a fave because I love white chocolate, and I love cereal.
23 Boy Brow, Glossier, $16
That friend you have that’s been raving about Glossier’s Boy Brow? She/he is right. If you want natural-looking, defined brows, the secret is this tinted pomade. Small, but mighty.
24 Beauty Dust, Moon Juice, $38
If you live in L.A., then you probably get it. If you don’t, I’m sorry. We’re weird. Sprinkle some of this dust in your tea, coffee, smoothie, or even warmed up mug of vanilla almond milk. This dust is supposed to, according to Moon Juice’s site, “protect cells from free radical damage,” help “the body to preserve collagen,” and basically make you look eternally youthful forever.
25 Women’s Cheeky Brief, MeUndies, $18
These are the comfiest undies, ever.
26 Sac Bretelle, Clare V., $255
I’ve been drooling over this Clare V. bag for at least a year. It’s the same one Ingrid gets in Ingrid Goes West, but instead of leopard print, this one has stars.
27 Old Books Candle, Etsy, $18
Calling all bookworms!
28 Slip Silk Sleep Mask, Anthropologie, $45
Supposedly you’re supposed to have all silk everything in bed (sheets, pillowcase, etc.) because it’s more gentle on your skin. But if that sounds daunting, start with this silk sleeping mask.
29 The Cozy Long Robe, Victoria’s Secret, $69.50
Try to stop me from wearing this fuzzy robe all winter long. Just try.
30 Sunbeam Heating Pad, Amazon, $12.99
Maybe this isn’t exactly a “gift” and more like “an attachment that your uterus needs every month,” but you can’t deny it’s useful.
31 The Abigail ‘s Party Dress, Tucker, $211.65
This dress has matryoshka dolls all over it. That is all.
32 Anchor Hand and Lip Balm, Captain Blankenship, $20
Ain’t gonna lie, the packaging is what gets me every time with Captain Blankenship.
33 Beet Ketchup, Chut Up, $7.50
Never feel bad again about dipping every single piece of food you own into a pile of ketchup (not that you should feel bad, anyway), because may I present you HEALTHY ketchup made of BEETS?
34 Cinnamon Coffee Body Soap, Meow Meow Tweet, $12
I actually wouldn’t mind if I had to wash my mouth out with this soap — it smells like it would taste delicious.
35 Hiphugger period underwear, Thinx, $34
Please someone actually get me a pair of period underwear! I’m tired of ruining all my pairs!
36 T(it) Shirt, Still Here, $55
Wear this shirt to your conservative parent’s friend’s house for the holidays, shock/piss them off in style.
37 Oaui Rose Hair & Body Oil, Sephora, $32
Anything Jen Atkin creates, I will slather all over my body and hair. I just will.
38 Flannel Pajama Set in Tartan Plaid, J.Crew, $95
There’s an art to buying the perfect pair of jammies: Make sure the fabric is sturdy, but soft (you don’t want it getting stiff or shredding after one wash), go for a pattern you’ll love all year long (or at least in this case, the fall-winter months when it’s cold — you wouldn’t wear long-sleeved PJs in spring or summer anyway), and make sure it’s roomy!