13 reasons to love sex in a long-term relationship
There’s no denying that sex is freakin’ FUN. Whether it’s by yourself, with a long-term partner, or with a hook-up, sex can be a stress reliever that feels better than pretty much anything in the world. That said, many tend to think that monogamy leads to stale, boring sex — after all, how could sex with the same person over and over again be any fun?
The answer to that question: SO MANY REASONS. People who are in LTRs have the opportunity for some mind-blowing sexcapades. Pop culture may make it seem a new parter is always hotter and more spicy, but let’s not forget pleasures of a tried-and-true tumble in the sheets.
Here are 13 reasons why sex in a long-term relationship is seriously underated:
Women in LTRs are more likely to have an orgasm.
A 2013 study found that women in serious relationships are twice as likely to reach orgasm during sex as women who are hooking up. That’s probably because. . .
You know exactly what the other likes.
There’s no guesswork involved; you know exactly what pace your partner likes, what their favorite positions are, and what gets them going — and vice versa. You’ve already got through the trial and error phase and can make pretty much any sex session steamy. And during sex, it feels like you both share a brain. You’re like a sexy, well-oiled machine.
You can guess what your partner may like to try.
Just because you’re in an LTR doesn’t mean there are no surprises. Because you know what the other likes, you can guess what they might like to try. There’s nothing like discovering a fun (and AMAZING) new thing to do in bed together.
You can bounce sexy ideas off each other.
Putting your brains together = TWICE the hot ideas. Plus, getting a text when you’re in the office saying, “Hey, let’s try ____ tonight, then drink wine and watch Netflix” is pretty much the dream.
Fighting in a relationship is never fun, but let’s be real: There’s nothing quite like make-up sex. The intensity of passion and heightened emotions is just something you can’t get from a hook-up.
You feel totally comfortable.
You don’t awkwardly shuffle out of bed with a sheet wrapped around you, because your partner has seen your naked body plenty of times, and you feel totally confident baring it all. You don’t worry about messy your hair gets or sweating. It’s just your partner — they won’t judge you, because they love you. So you can be your totally weird self, and it’s *so* much better that way.
You know what’s going on in the STD/STI department.
With a monogamous long-term partner, you’ve already The Talk and you know about any possible risks. Goodbye, distraction in the heat of the moment by sudden pangs of worry!
There’s no playing games.
This isn’t the beginning of Bridesmaids. You don’t have to plan an elaborate exit strategy; you don’t have to worry about whether s/he likes you, or whether you’re going to be seeing each other again. You don’t have to read cryptic texts and try to figure out whether you’re taking things to the next level — or if you even want to do that at all. Nope, there are no games involved — just hot, passionate sex. (That is, unless you feel like playing an actual game in bed. Naked Scrabble, anyone?)
Awkward moments aren’t awkward — they’re funny!
If a weird noise or bodily function happens in the middle of the deed, it’s just another thing for you guys to giggle about. Your bedroom is a no-shame zone when you’re in an LTR.
Is there anything better than that lovey-dovey cuddling session intermingled with afterglow after a seriously hot session? In a hookup, cuddling can complicate things. In an LTR, you can rest assured that you can get unlimited post-sex snuggles.
Sex can be an expression of true love.
In a hookup, it can be tempting to shut off any emotional feelings to preserve yourself. Sure — pure, physical sex, no strings attached, can be freeing and fun. But when you’re in an LTR, sex becomes not only a physical release, but an emotional connection that goes beyond words. (Yeah, yeah — cheesy, I know.)
Sex becomes a mutual long-term exploration.
You can absolutely explore your sexuality on your own or via hookups and that’s certainly valuable. But when you’re having sex in a long-term relationship with the same person, you’re building on your exploration of yourself. . . together. It’s a pretty amazing learning experience and it’s so much easier to learn new things that your body responds to when you’re in a safe, comfortable zone.
You get to know each other on a deeper level than anyone else.
You can know someone’s favorite color, their dreams, their ambitions, their fears. But adding a sexual component means that you’re getting to know someone on a level deeper than anyone else. In an LTR, you’re seeing your partner at their most vulnerable and beautiful. Is there anything better than that?