Meet the Cronut of 2014: The Cragel
Everyone, this is the Cragel. The Cragel, this is everyone.
Now that we are introduced, let’s get to know each other a little better.
The Cragel was born out of Brooklyn bakery shop The Bagel Store and is the brainchild of bakery owner Scot Rossillo, a god amongst men. It is 50% bagel, 50% croissant, 100% carbohydrates and all genius.
The Cragel comes after the success of the Cronut, the baked darling of 2013. This croissant-donut mash-up was the most delightful combination since the Sabrina the Teenage Witch/Boy Meets World crossover episode.
The cronut, which was conceived by part-time chef, full-time genius Dominique Ansel, created an absurd, bordering on psychotic demand amongst New York City foodies, the likes of which could only be fully understood by a 17th century Dutchman’s affinity for tulips.
If 2013 was to Cronut as 2014 will be to Cragel, then I wonder what confectionary Frankenstein will be spawned in 2015. Below are a few of my edible guesses/ hopes/ fever dreams.
It would be a croissant made of pretzel dough. It could come with salt, cinnamon sugar or nacho cheese. I would like someone to make this a reality in the near future. Auntie Anne and Mr. Wetzel, I am looking at you two.
2. Pretzel Pie Crust
Again, Auntie Anne and Mr. Wetzel, I am looking at you two to make this Ms. Calendar you could also throw your hat in this ring, as well.
3. Spumoni Cannoli
This is sure to be the most Italian thing since the Bocce ball tournament at the Coppola family reunion.
4. Red Velvet Toaster Strudel
The crust would be red velvet and the filling would be cream cheese frosting.
There are already red velvet Pop-Tarts, because the Pop-Tart creative team understands what the people want. The Pillsbury dough-boy is adorable, but what he has in cuteness he clearly lacks in market research.
5. Eclair Claw
Eclair made in the shape of bear claws. Just think how Parisian police officers would look.
6. Sunny D flavored Fruit-by-the-Foot
I understand that this is not a baked good, but it is a combination of two childhood staples is something that your now mature mentality and palate would readily enjoy.
7. Magels or Buffins
These should become a thing just so that either of these names can enter into the English vernacular.
8. Cinnamon Rollnut
I know a cinnamon roll-donut seems like it would be a commonplace concoction, but once you realize that cinnamon rollnuts have the potential to yield cinnamon rollnut holes then you recognize the true genius and originality of this proposition.