Rachel Paige
July 29, 2016 7:21 am
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There’s been a lot of Gilmore Girls talk lately. You’ve obviously seen this, unless you’ve been living under a rock at the bottom of a very deep cavern, buried well into the utmost center of the Earth’s core. By now, you know it’s coming back, and that it’s finally got a release date of November 25th, 2016. That’s 120 days away, and yeah, for the next 120 days I’ll be keeping tally, you’re welcome.

When the revival date and the trailer dropped Wednesday, I started screaming, as you do. But like, I literally started screaming, because I work in the HelloGiggles office, and it’s totally acceptable for me to just sit at my desk and scream about Gilmore Girls (note to everyone: find a job that let’s you scream about Gilmore Girls). The rest of my day was completely consumed by Lorelai and Rory, and as we inched closer towards quittin’ time, and literally like six Gilmore Girls stories later, my editor Madison asked one really simple and easy question:

“Why do you like Gilmore Girls so much?”

I paused, and I went “uhhhhh” and then I told the story as to how I watched Gilmore Girls for the first time (Freshmen year in college, no friends, realized ABC Family played Gilmore Girls every morning at 11 a.m. AND 4 p.m. in chronological order, figured it was a perfect time to watch it ALL). But then I was like, that’s kinda a bullshit answer. That’s not a real answer as to WHY I like Gilmore Girls. That’s just the answer as to WHY I watched it the first time around (you know, because it was on TV, and I’ll binge anything once).

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I spent the rest of my day trying to really figure out why I like Gilmore Girls. It wasn’t until later, as I was driving home from work, that it hit me like a lightning bolt to the head:

It’s because deep down inside, I want to live in the Gilmore world. TBH, I don’t even want to be a Gilmore. I’d be a bad Gilmore. But I want to live in that fast-talking, ever-changing, pop-culture heavy life that is funny, sweet, and magical, and has lots of coffee. That’s my dream.

I’m jealous of that life, and I wish it were real. That’s why I like Gilmore Girls.

All my life I’ve talked fast, like, very fast, like people have to tell me to slow down because they can’t understand what I’ms saying fast. That’s due to the fact that I think fast, and I’ve learned that lots of people can’t keep up. Is that a First World problem? Like, OMG, I’m carrying on a conversation so quickly people aren’t catching the great jokes I’m making, this sucks, oh woe the day.

OKAY, BUT THAT’S A THING FOR ME. Do you know how hard it is to meet someone, and instantly launch into a long monologue about nothing, but it’s riddled with pop culture commentary, and have your new acquaintance just give you a look like, “Da fuq?” It makes me want to not talk, because why am I wasting my breath? Also, I then come off semi-crazy. I ramble, I go off on tangents, I try to make as many references as possible, and I talk just to talk.

I’ve been doing it for the last 545 words, so…

But when Lorelai does it, she is goddamn charming. Lorelai can talk for HOURS, and you just eat up her every word, because she delivers it so well, and she’s living in a world where people totally get that’s who she is and accept it. With this real world I’m currently stuck in, after thirty seconds of talking people are sometimes like, “plz stop.”

Deep down inside, I yearn to live in a fast-paced world, just like the Gilmores! And the coffee! But mostly the talking fast!

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You’d think after 10 years (17 years, if we’re counting from the beginning of Gilmore Girls, and how old do you feel right now?) this fast talking, rambling storytelling approach to the world would be acceptable. It is not. Very few people find me charming and endearing, even though I’m doing the same thing that Lorelai is — she obviously does it better, but I like to think I’m trying as hard as I can.

That’s the real root of why I like Gilmore Girls. I’m honestly jealous of them, and their make-believe world that I want to be so REAL. Maybe one day it will be. Hey, with the revival on the way, and more and more Gilmore Girls binges taking place, it’s quite possible that everyone else is finally going to catch up.

Get it? Catch up? Because everything happens SO FAST? No? Okay. More coffee, please.