gilmore girls cast
Credit: Warner Bros.

Stars Hollow will never be the same.

On Wednesday night’s episode of Full Frontal, Samantha Bee revealed why Donald Trump is basically Paris Geller from Gilmore Girls and, well, now we’ll never be able to look at our favorite Joseph Stalin-quoting Chilton grad without thinking of the Orange One ever again.

Thanks, Sam.

Speaking on President Trump’s controversial firing of acting Attorney General Sally Yates Monday night for “refusing to enforce a legal order designed to protect the citizens of the United States,” Bee noted the similarities between Trump stacking his cabinet with “loyal” yes-men and Geller stacking Chilton’s esteemed The Franklin with her dim-witted band of cronies.

“Remember on Gilmore Girls when Paris Geller staffed the school newspaper with her most loyal friends with no regard for talent level?” Bee asked. “It’s like that, [but] with the leader of the free world and nukes.”

Whoa, whoa whoa.

While we agree that the White House issuing a statement that an esteemed Attorney General “betrayed the Department of Justice” just for doing her job is frankly terrifying, and that Madeline and Louise made lousy editors, we cannot get on board with any comparison between Trump and the single funniest character on Gilmore Girls.

Credit: Netflix

Sure, Paris could be a tyrant — her reign over the Yale Daily News was a holy terror — but the most important thing about her was her ability to grow and learn from her mistakes; to temper her rage and ambition with humility and kindness.

Through her friendships with equally strong-willed folks like Rory and Doyle, Paris became a better person capable of putting others first when they truly need it — and that, of course, is something we don’t ever count on seeing from President Trump.