Sammy Nickalls
June 16, 2016 5:49 am
Netflix/IMDB

After a year of waiting, we’re finally getting the new season Orange Is The New Black (OITNB) — and based on the photos and trailers, it looks like it’s going to be as amazing as ever. However, after binge-watching the last season in one go last June, it can be hard to remember where we left off. Did Piper and Alex break up (again)? Who has Daya’s baby? Here’s everything you need to know in preparation for the new OITNB season on Friday (!!!).

Caputo

Netflix / giphy.com

Let’s start with the business end, shall we? Season 3 began with Caputo in charge after Figueroa was knocked off her throne, and it looked like conditions at the prison were about to get better. . . until Caputo discovered that Litchfield was slated to be closed down due to budget issues. Caputo just can’t catch a break, right?

However, private corporation MMR swept in and saved Litchfield. . . then promptly made it so, so much worse by making the inmates do slave labor and bringing in incompetent guards. Oh, and Caputo ended up accepting a promotion from MMR, so who even KNOWS what’s gonna happen to Litchfield now.

Piper

Netflix / giphy.com

Piper has been caught up in quite a bit of relationship drama with Alex (of course). After she learned that she has returned to Litchfield, the two made up. . . that is, until Piper admitted that she was the one who ratted her out to her parole officer. Anger can lead to ~heat~ and the two former loves ended up hooking up in the library, eventually smoothing things out and actually dating. That is, until Piper’s dirty underwear mob ring and her affair with Stella cause Alex to break things off for good.

But that’s not to say Piper’s fling with Stella lasted long — Stella double-crossed her by stealing the proceeds from the panty business, and Piper got back at her by framing her and getting her sent to maximum security prison. Trust no bitch.

Alex

Netflix / giphy.com

Sure, Alex has been dealing with her wild rollercoaster of a relationship with Piper, but she’s had bigger problems — such as being terrified of being killed by her former boss, Kubra, via one of his minions undercover at Litchfield. Piper assumes she’s just being paranoid and Alex *does* end up attacking a perfectly innocent (yet delusional) woman who she thought was actually an assassin; however, it turns out that Alex had plenty to be worried about, because in the last episode, she’s cornered by a new guard who’s sent by Kubra. Season 3 ended on that cliffhanger, because Netflix can be oh so cruel.

Red

Netflix / giphy.com

Red started Season 3 on a new foot after she put an end to her in-house smuggling system by filling the hole in the greenhouse with cement. Though she was heartbroken to discover that her family store was shut down, she put all her focus and efforts into her one true love: cooking.

After growing close with Healy, she persuaded him to make her the head of the kitchen again — though unfortunately, MMA subsequently introduced the “boil in the bag” meals that took away pretty much ANY creative liberties for poor Red. But she fought back by growing her own vegetables in the garden and hosting her own fancy dinner parties, like the classy badass she is.

Poussey

Netflix / giphy.com

Poussey had a rough season, struggling with her depression and with her dependence on hooch. She even started to get hooked on porn — specifically, Suzanne’s erotic fiction (which became quite popular among the inmates before it was confiscated).

However, Poussey pulled through and even saved the life of Soso, who almost overdosed on pills. In fact, it looks as though the two may have found love in each other, as they were seen holding hands at the end of the season. We think they’d make a super cute couple, TBH.

Norma

Netflix / giphy.com

Silent Norma really came into her own last season, ya know, for a mystic who performs miracles. As her cult-like following grew in numbers, we learned about her murky past being one of many wives of a “prophet” (who she later ended up murdering, hence her stay in Litchfield).

After Leanne and Soso start butting heads, Soso accuses Norma of allowing the group to bully her. . . and later, Poussey blames Norma for Soso’s overdose. Maybe Norma isn’t quite as miraculous as she seemed.

Daya

Netflix / giphy.com

Season 3 began with Daya and Bennett lying about the identity of their baby’s father, so this was bound to be a dramatic plot from the get-go. Although they seemed adorable from the beginning (he proposed with a ring made out of gum wrappers!), it suddenly became a lot less cute when Bennett suddenly disappeared after being visibly bothered by Daya’s family situation at home with the volatile Cesar.

Suddenly faced with the responsibility of being a single mother in prison, Daya had a hard choice to make — allow Mendez’s mother to take care of the baby even though he’s not the father, or sending the baby back to the same hard home life Daya herself experienced. She finally decided to fess up to Mendez’s mother. . . who still wanted to raise the baby, being the kind soul she is. However, the baby ultimately wound up with Cesar. . . that is, before he got sent to prison, so who knows what will happen to Daya’s little bundle of joy?

Pennsatucky

Netflix / giphy.com

Pennsatucky deserves an award for having moved up the ranks from most hated to most beloved. The harsh realities of prison had made her calm down with her radical conservatism and after she became close friends with Big Boo, she gained perspectives we never would have expected. She even got a brand new set of beautiful teeth, so things were looking up — until she was horribly raped by a nasty, manipulative CO. She and Big Boo go after him for revenge, though they stopped before hurting him. Here’s hoping that Season 4 will prove to be a better one for one of our fave characters.

Sophia

Netflix / giphy.com

After a feud with Mendoza about their sons, Sophia became an outcast in the prison and her salon quickly emptied of customers. But it turned out that a lack of business was the least of Sophia’s worries after she became the victim of a horrible hate crime; she was beaten by two other inmates and subsequently placed in solitary confinement “for her own safety” by MMR, despite Caputo’s insistence that she be let out.

Suzanne and Taystee

Netflix / giphy.com

After Rosa’s (pretty badass) murder of Vee, Suzanne was feeling pretty lost — leading her to pen the infamous “Time Hump Chronicles.” Meanwhile, Taystee ended up becoming the new (and way kinder) “den mother” of Vee’s old gang. We approve of this den mom much, much more.

Nicky

OITNB fans everywhere were devastated after Nicky ended up succumbing to her heroin craving; when she got herself in hot water with a drug-smuggling deal with Luschek, she was sent to maximum security. Here’s hoping that she’ll somehow be let back into Litchfield on good behavior, but as of now, it looks like Nicky is officially done.

Netflix / giphy.com

SO. MANY. FEELINGS.

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