You know how people always ask “kiss or hug” on those weird Myspace-y surveys? Like if you had to choose, would you rather have a kiss or a hug? What about a high five, though? Why is that never an option? Today is National High Five Day and I am here to argue that high fives are the most romantic gesture out there.
Okay, I know that obviously you can high five anyone – your boss, your brother, your teacher, your customer – and you cannot just kiss anyone, so there is a bit of discretion here, but you know when you have a crush on someone and they high five you and it is the biggest deal ever?
…in middle school, at least?
Think about it, though. High fives require coordination, first of all. If two people can coordinate the perfect high five, there is a surefire sign of chemistry between them.
You also cannot just hug anyone. Many years ago, I had a huge crush on someone that I worked with. We had quite the back-and-forth relationship, and I was really good friends with his friends, as well. Because we had all of this sexual tension built up, we never really hugged or anything at work because it would have been “too weird.” I hugged his best friend all the time though because it was very “no pressure.” This dude and I, though? We mastered the high five. He used to high five me so hard it would burn my hand, which I always took to mean that we had a lot of passion between the two of us.
Um, remember Jim and Pam?
And Robin and Barney?
And Nick and Jess?
Mila and Justin, anyone?
And Liz and herself?
Okay, and if that wasn’t enough, high fives are awesome because they don’t have to mean true love or anything, they can also just be a really strong way of promoting your loyalty to, and understanding of your friends.
Like Rachel and Monica.
Anne and Leslie.
Seth and Amy.
And of course Tina and Amy.
Amy Poehler = best high fiver ever?
ALRIGHT GUYS. My hands hurt just thinking about all of the great high fives out there. Get off the couch and go high five everyone in site. Make it romantic, or friendly, or just whatever. High fives are the new everything.