Rachel Leishman
October 08, 2017 4:29 pm

Have you ever stopped to listen to the popular Halloween song “Monster Mash”? Like, really listen to the words? If so, you might have realized something a little weird. Recently, the internet has been awash with a lot of theories about the song. From when it actually takes place to what it is about, everyone is talking.

And it makes sense. It is Halloween time. You can go out there with your grown-up candy corn floats and see celebrities dressing up as witches to get you in the spirit. Or, you can listen to your favorite Halloween songs and think about a bunch of monsters dancing around.

And, if you’re like the internet, you can realize that what you think the song is about isn’t what the song is actually about.

Because the Internet has discovered that you’ve never actually heard the “Monster Mash.”

Sure, you’ve heard the Bobby Pickett song, “Monster Mash” — but that’s just about a guy watching monsters dance and listen to the real “Monster Mash.” Think about it like this. The man singing is just describing to you what happened. Not as it is happening, but as he saw it.

That’s right, we’re just hearing a story about it, not living in the song. Seems a little weird, right? It always felt like we were listening to the “Monster Mash” itself, but instead, we were just listening to a man sing about it.

Still not getting it? Think of it like Tenacious D’s song “Tribute.”

A lot of people couldn’t handle the revelation.

While others just had jokes.

This is the second theory to come out in a while. The first being that the Monster Mash doesn’t necessarily take place on Halloween. It is just in the lab late one night. He could have been out on a Wednesday in June for all we know.

All this means is that it is that time of year again. We’re all getting in the Halloween spirit and jamming out to the Bobby Pickett classic. It also means that we, as adults, are ready to break down any theory about this song we can. Because, after all, it is a graveyard smash.

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