Madison Vanderberg
November 14, 2017 12:01 pm

Taylor Swift released Reputation last week, and since then, everyone has had an opinion about it. The album was largely well-received by critics, the internet (as per usual) was split, but Spencer Pratt (as in married to Heidi and formerly of The Hills fame) is the Swift superfan we had no idea we needed. Pratt says he relates to Swift’s narrative of being villainized and says he feels like his trajectory after The Hills was similar to what happened to Swift’s reputation. Pratt and Swift having similar narratives is a stretch, but we’ll let him have that one.

Pratt sat down with Cosmopolitan.com to give his track-by-track review of Reputation, and honestly, forget the critics, all you need to read is Pratt’s commentary. Here are some of the best bits:

On this being Swift’s best album: “I know why she waited three years, because she’s been in the lab cookin’ a freakin’ Picasso here.”

On the powerful transcendent nature of Swift’s music: “I just wish the concert was tonight. I actually had a dream last night that I was in the club with no shirt on in pretty much booty shorts, they were so small, and Heidi was there, Gunner was there, and I had Mophie chargers all around because I was doing so much Snap content dancing in the club to all the songs. I rarely dream so that’s how powerful this album was.”

On “…Ready for It?”: “That is poetic, like some shit Robert Frost would have been writing back in the day.”

On her collab with Ed Sheeran: “I don’t need to hear Ed Sheeran rapping. When he started singing I was like, ‘OK, homie’s got pipes.’ I’m feeling those singing parts. But him rapping with his Irish accent, I was like, ‘Come on now.’ I don’t need this in my life. I don’t need Taylor to be on any records with anybody…”

On “Don’t Blame Me”: “This is what I imagine I’m gonna play when I’m feeding my hummingbirds. My hummers are gonna love this one.”

On her relationship with Tom Hiddleston: “[Tom Hiddleston] was like a James Bond to her! He was doing that dope-ass spy TV show, he’s probably all spy swaggy. I really loved them together so I’m still kind of sad about [their breakup].”

On her relationship with Joe Alwyn: “Girl, don’t give Joe your soul yet! You just started dating.”

On Taylor Swift’s squad: “How is Spencer Pratt riding harder for Taylor Swift’s new singles than any of that clique that she had at all her barbecues that I’m sure she sent Hermès bags to? Cars, who knows what Taylor gift levels are.”

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