Elizabeth Entenman
July 17, 2014 9:05 am

“Shh, it’s starting. . .Oh, COME ON! This is just the ten-second animation for the production company.”— me, every time I go to the movie theater.

We’ve all been there: The lights dim, the screen goes dark and you’re amped the movie is finally starting. Except it’s not the movie, but a cinematic logo for one of the companies that helped make the film. Production companies’ logos are getting more complex and creative, according to a recent article in The New York Times. Thanks to multiple logo intros for the same movie, they’re also getting more confusing. It messes with your brain when all signs indicate that Neighbors is starting, and the screen fills with kids playing with sparklers instead. Am I in the wrong theater? Maybe this movie starts with a flashback. Then seconds in, you realize they “got” you yet again.

I thought it was time to familiarize myself with these production companies’ logos so the next time I’m at the movies I can anticipate what’s coming and breeze through the beginning of the film, stress-free. But chances are, I’ll always refer to Mandate Pictures as “girl beating on the drum.” Some of these are old and some are new, but all of them make you go, “Oh, come on! Start the movie already!”

1. Spyglass Entertainment

I love me some movies about water. Except, what’s that in the water? A telescope? Wait a minute, THIS ISN’T THE MOVIE.

2. Dreamworks

This looks contemplative. There’s a night sky, some clouds. Any second now we’re going to dive in, pan down to a beautiful shot of Manhattan city lights and Katherine Heigl will start her voice-over on the backstory to her last breaku–SERIOUSLY? Not actually the movie.

3. Savoy Pictures

“We open on a herd of running buffalo.” That’s a pitch I wouldn’t put past Hollywood. But in this case, I’m wrong. This is just the movie before the movie.

4. Mandate Pictures

People are already running! This movie doesn’t waste any time. What are they running toward? A drum? What’s happening with the perspective? Aaand, this is not the movie I came to see.

5. Legendary Pictures

And we’re off with a spark. This opening scene is going to be a good one, full of action. What are we looking at? Maybe a sunrise, or a sunset? All that coupled with the dramatic music means something is going to happen. Or not.

6. Ghost House Pictures

I never see scary movies, but I found this, and it’s about as real as can be. *shudder*

7. The Rank Organisation

I wonder if this man is friends with the Mandate Pictures drum girl.

8. RKO Pictures

We’re traveling through space! The movie is starting and we’re traveling through space! Just kidding, the movie hasn’t started yet. Besides, we’re watching Oklahoma! and space doesn’t exist yet.

9. Davis Entertainment

Are we watching Up? Nope, just the title card for Davis Entertainment. Production companies sure love sky metaphors.

10. Bonus: THX

This is the official sound of a movie about to start, and to this day it gives me chills. If my parents wanted me to behave as a child, they should have just played this sound, because even though it got me excited to watch a movie, it also instilled in me the fear of God.

Featured image courtesy of Dreamworks

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