Despite having never been married, there’s one thing we’ve always known about the subject of heteronormative matrimony: men have ~ feelings ~ about their chairs.
Kristen Bell, adoring wife of Dax Shepard, found this out the hard way this week, when Shepard’s desire to watch television at a higher comfort level clashed with her desire to have a living room that isn’t hideous. As a result, Bell and Shepard are now ingrained in an all-out Instagram trial, “Bell v. Shepard,” that we will be ruling upon momentarily.
(This probably goes without saying, but we their Instagram followers are judge, jury, and probably bailiff, too, because why not.)
Argument from the plaintiff, Kristen Bell: “This is not a bit. @daxshepard has sincerely suggested the new home for the lazy boy from his office be in the center of my living room. He made an adorable argument about how epic his TV viewing experience will be if I let him keep it there. The man has lost his mind. #chiphappens”
Argument from the defendant, Dax Shepard: “My wife, in an attempt to discredit my character, will be posting a similar picture, but with the expressed intention of attacking my sense of style in home furnishings. The proof of this Lazyboy’s aesthetic appeal is written all over my face. #getcomfy #functionbeforefashion”
The verdict: That is one eyesore of a chair. Burn it immediately, then buy a comfier couch for the living room if that one isn’t doing it for him. Duh.