You guys, this is crazy: Kermit and Miss Piggy have officially broken up
Another one of our favorite couples has called it quits, and this one is breaking our hearts into a hundred thousand tiny little pieces. Kermit the Frog and his long-term paramour, Miss Piggy, are no more. SAY IT ISN’T SO.
But, alas, it’s true. The couple, which have been in an on-again off-again relationship since the ’70s, appeared together at the Television Critics Association summer press tour and confirmed the split. Kermit spoke to the crowd of reporters and explained that, “Piggy and I have gone our separate ways romantically.” Miss Piggy, in true Piggy fashion, commented that, “Dating [her] is like flying close to the sun. It was inevitable that Kermit would drop down to the ground while [she] stayed in the heavens.”
The couple then Tweeted out a joint statement, as seen below.
Three boxes of tissues later, still not over this breakup. Kermit has already moved onto another pig (he has a type) named Denise, and Piggy may or may not be dating Topher Grace.
Out of all the celebrity breaks ups this summer — and there have been so many? WHY IS LIFE SO CRUEL? — this one hits incredibly close to home for Muppet fans.
Through the heartbreak, let’s take a look back at some of their best moments together. Certainly these two can make it work in the end! They’re Kermit and Piggy! Piggy and Kermit! They go together like peanut butter and jelly, or a frog and a pig!
Without the two of them together, they’ll be no more romantic bike rides through the park. Kermit won’t be able to show of all his sweet bike tricks anymore.
Without Piggy and Kermit, we can longer dream about how outlandish and over the top their wedding will be. (They technically did get married that one time during Muppets Take Manhattan, even though it’s not considered an “official” Muppet wedding)
Piggy and Kermit can no longer tell their future pig/frog children that they met once upon a time in Nanny’s daycare, and how they had so many crazy adventures together.
NO MORE BOAT RIDES WHILE SINGING “NEVER BEFORE, NEVER AGAIN.”
Or just like that time the two of them did a joint interview on Larry King back in the ’90s, and things got heated between Piggy and Larry for a little bit, before Kermit had to reel them both in. Good times.
They’ll be no more of Piggy’s “HI-YA” action-chops, where she lovingly hits/pushes/punches Kermit. Cue Kermie’s gulp.
Now that they’re broken up, it just means that they have to get back together, right? Good thing we’ll see everything about their relationship unfold when The Muppets comes to ABC this fall. It’s already our new favorite show of the season.
But seriously: Kermit, Piggy, if you’re reading this, try to remember all the good times you had. Relationships take work—especially when you’re two different species. But if anyone can survive a rough patch it’s you two. After all, you have survived a lot worse. Need we remind you of the amnesia, the stolen identity, the jewel thieves and that precarious parachute drop into the middle of Manhattan? Yeah if you can get through that, you can totally get through this.
(Images via The Muppets, Disney/ABC, Giphy)