Candace Ganger
March 09, 2016 9:40 am

One of the most iconic television shows of all time, and probably one of the most influential in molding my tween/teen mind, is none other than Friends. You know the show. Six friends — Ross, Monica, Ross, Rachel, Joey, Chandler, and Phoebe — whose lives are intertwined in the most entertaining of ways. Watching this show in the ’90s, I thought myself to be a total free-spirited Phoebe with crushes on all the Joeys of the world. As I’ve gotten older, I now know I’ve always been a Monica, and was lucky enough to end up with my Chandler.

Aside from providing me with a dose of happiness week after week, I find myself using Friends phrases on the regular. Here are 10 key Friends phrases that have stayed with me long since the show ended its 10-year run. Truth is, I hear them floating around from other people as well, so it’s pretty safe to say that Friends-talk has become part of our common parlance.

So, thank you Friends, for always being a friend to me, and providing me with the perfect replies — even when I’m totally awkward and can’t come up with something witty on my own.

1) “Isn’t that just kick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?” — Rachel

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I don’t know about you, but there have been plenty of times in conversation, happy or sad, when I have absolutely no clue how to respond. You’re engaged/pregnant/getting your dream job? “Congrats” doesn’t seem to be descriptive enough. Or maybe you broke up with a partner or were fired. Saying “sorry” doesn’t seem empathetic enough. This response works for just about every situation because of its ambiguity! However you say it, remember this: it’s all in the delivery.

2) “It’s a moo point. It’s like a cow’s opinion; it doesn’t matter. It’s moo.” — Joey

Ever been in an argument you feel you can’t win? Like which band is better or what show is the most interesting? End it quickly with this. If it’s good enough for Joey, it’s good enough to confuse your opponent and you may win by default because most arguments are moo, aren’t they?

3) “JOEY DOESN’T SHARE FOOD!” — Joey

I have found, whenever I buy myself chocolate, it seems my friends, my kids, my family want all of it before I’ve had my first piece. Of course I share (because I’m no monster) but what I really want to say is the above, because, MINE! ALL MINE!

4) “She’s your lobster.” — Phoebe

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Whether you’re in a brand new relationship or one that’s gone the distance, there’s no better way to express all the feels than “you’re my lobster.” This phrase is swoon-worthy because it implies you’re meant to be, without having to actually say, you know, “I love you.”

5) “Hold me closer, Tony Danza…” — Phoebe

I’m a stickler for learning the lyrics to songs before I sing them anywhere outside of my shower. This is mostly due to my very Monica-like personality. I like to be accurate for confidence reasons. My husband, on the other hand, really doesn’t care. Not even a little. But it doesn’t matter because he has heart and passion and confidence that whatever words he’s singing are totally the right ones. Besides, we’ve probably all been there (Tony Danza = Tiny Dancer) at some point.

6) “PIVOT!” — Ross 

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Has anyone, post this episode, ever moved a piece of furniture without yelling, “PIVOT” at the other person? I thought not.

7) “Unagi.” — Ross

Life can be stressful. Yoga, meditation, and a relaxing bath sure are calming but for times when it’s not enough, you can at least seem self-aware, just like Ross, by repeating the phrase Unagi (which actually means freshwater eel, but who will know?). See? Don’t you feel better already?

8) “You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection.” — Chandler

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Ever think someone is the hottest person alive and they offer you gum and you have NO IDEA how to respond? Gum is always the answer. Gum is perfection.

9) “I’m being transferred to Yemen.” — Chandler

Speaking of tough relationships, looking for an excuse to peace out gracefully without hurting someone’s feelings? Of course the best option is honesty, but a close second would be to move to Yemen because obviously it’s an easier play.

10) “We were on a break!”-Ross

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Relationships are tough and sometimes it’s unclear whether you were actually together together during a specific time period. Maybe there’s some confusion on the timeline, or maybe one of you has a different view on the situation. If you’re anything like Ross, just say this phrase as often as possible and maybe eventually, it will make sense.

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