jessica tholmer
October 14, 2013 9:00 am

I have had a weird week. I have been an emotional rollercoaster and I have been running a fever and coughing through the night and working too much and then there was the Finn episode of Glee that just really wrecked me. I started to write THREE different EINTKILFs and I felt so uninspired that I couldn’t finish any of them. I sat, looking around my living room at my DVDs, and my books, and even my roommate’s cat Layla, thinking…should I write about an Eric Clapton song?

And then I decided, nah. Miley instead. So thanks for being there for me, “Wrecking Ball.”

EINTKILF Miley Cyrus’ “Wrecking Ball (Video)

1. BLUE EYES ARE SO BEAUTIFUL.

The first time I fell in love with a pair of blue eyes was in the third grade. They were attached to Gary Carrier’s head, and I loved him as much as my eight year old heart could love a person. (It wasn’t just his eyes, he was also a very talented drawer and he always made me laugh.) The next time was when I saw Titanic and met Leonardo DiCaprio’s baby blues through the trauma of a shipwreck. It has all been downhill from there. I think Miley did a really great thing here by starting this video with her blue eyes. Immediate attention grabber. If I didn’t already know this, I would know this now. Blue eyes are gorgeous. 

2. Kissing works like a love potion. 
“We kissed, I fell under your spell. A love no one could deny.”

Been. There. Done. That.

3. Sinead O’Connor had a great video.
I know I shouldn’t even say that because of the feud or whatever is going on, (I’m not into feuds. I ignore them.) but I mean obviously I think of “Nothing Compares 2 U” when I watch “Wrecking Ball.” Also, just a quick holla to Sinead for one of the saddest songs of all-time.

4. Sledgehammers are multi-purpose. 
They can be: your lover as well as break down walls. Literally break them down, not like Miley is talking about here with her ex-love.

Oh wait, I get it.

5. Wrecking balls are the new stripper pole. 
Don’t freak out on me just yet. I am not calling Miley a stripper, nor am I saying anything negative about strippers. I am a fan of ladies doing whatever they would like. I am just saying Miley works that wrecking ball like a pole. It is pretty impressive.

6. Keep your boots on in a construction site.


Even if all of your other clothes are missing.

7. God, heartbreak is the worst.
I’ma take a second to stop making jokes and just say that I truly find “Wrecking Ball” to be the most relatable sad love song in a very long time. It made me cry the first time I heard it, thinking of my ex-boyfriend of ages ago. I am annoyed that Miley’s beautiful words and gorgeous voice have stirred up those emotions in me, but I also thank her for making me feel again. 

Songs that make you think of “that person” are always special, you know? They are worth something.

8. Miley’s voice is beautiful.
As I just said above, I am pleasantly surprised to hear that Miley can actually sing.

Reinforced by the wonderful Jimmy Fallon and the Roots.

9. Give up.
This lesson might seem slightly backward, but the lyrics of this song just rip my heart open.

“I never meant to start a war
I just wanted you to let me in
And instead of using force
I guess I should’ve let you win”

As quite the stubborn young woman, I am not one to admit that I, on great occasion, let the other party win, but I do. And after my last breakup, I vowed to never fight someone who didn’t want to fight me back again. (Emotionally, don’t panic.) One-sided fighting is pointless, even if your intentions are pure. Never, ever fight for someone who will not fight for you. Don’t start wars, don’t use force, give up when it is time.

I have depressed myself. THANKS MILEY.

10. No one gets over anything ever.
“Don’t you ever say, I just walked away, I will always want you.”

Say what you will about her, but Miley has experienced some real heartbreak.

Relatable, relatable, relatable.

Featured image via , sledgehammer image via hitflix, boots image via billboard.

Advertisement