This week, the always awesome Ron Livingston was photographed at Sundance, recreating his famous break-up with Carrie Bradshaw. Don’t act like you don’t remember: Season 6 of Sex and the City, Livingston, AKA Jack Berger, broke up with Carrie, via a Post-It note. It read: “I’m sorry. I can’t. Don’t hate me.” As you can see below, it still says that.
OK, the whole Post-it break-up made for a great episode, but also a totally dated one. If the show was still on now, Berger’s super-jerk move would be executed via TEXT MESSAGE. And with text messages, at least you can write back and dump all your WTFs and maybe, just maybe, get a reasonable explanation or at least a few more words from said dumper. Hey, text break-ups are harsh but they’re better than Post-It goodbyes.
With that in mind, we rounded up some other classic Carrie Bradshaw crises that would never be an issue today.
Losing all her columns because she didn’t “back up” her work
Carrie would be thrilled to know that there is a such a thing as “the cloud” now. Actually, she probably wouldn’t get it. (She once hid from an email.) While you still probably should save things in said cloud, it’s a lot easier than the earlier 21st century “backup” plan. Besides, even just emailing documents to her editors would have automatically saved her work in the archives of the Internet. And by the way, the published versions would be online, not just in print. How about that?!
Not being able to get a taxi
Carrie is constantly struggling to find a taxi. CONSTANTLY. Maybe that’s just her thing. Girl loves to pose. But here’s what we do now: we use our phones. CB would totally have an Uber/Lyft app, schedule her pickup, and be whisked away. It’s a lot easier than waiting for Big to randomly pull up in his limo and say “Hey, Doll.”
Having to physically stalk your ex’s new girlfriend
There was a time before social media when you actually had to crash an event or stalk someone in a trench coat and sunglasses in order to get a glimpse of your ex’s new partner. Carrie actually dropped a bunch of cash to attend a luncheon to get a look at Natasha and then super-weirdly showed up while she was having lunch to talk to her. If only she had Instagram, all that awkwardness could have been avoided. Oh, the private joys of ex-related Internet deep-dives from the safety of your own home.
Sitting alone on your birthday thinking everyone forgot
Remember when she waited at Il Cantinore for hours for her birthday dinner, only to go home to a litany of apologies on her answering machine? Everyone was on their way/stuck in traffic/at the other Il Cantinore. If she had a cellphone she could have really worked out the scheduling kinks. Not that cell phones didn’t exist back then, they were just too big and clunky to fit into Carrie’s micro-handbags.
Having a serious Scrunchie-related fight
OK, this is a Berger thing, again. He and Carrie get into a full on debate about what type of woman wears scrunchies — and Carrie argues that a woman from New York would never wear a Scrunchie. She was wrong. Scrunchies totally made a comeback last year. And Carrie would have probably been one of the early revitalizers of the trend, because she likes weird stuff in her hair. So really, they totally wouldn’t have had a fight about a Scrunchie and maybe they’d still be together. Personally, Berger was always one of my favorite Carrie boyfriends. Judge away, but they were completely compatible, aside from this hair-tie business.