Warner Bros.
Nicole Cord-Cruz
July 31, 2018 1:00 pm

On this day 38 years ago, The Boy Who Lived was born. Coincidentally, today also marks the birthday of the person who made the Wizarding World happen: J.K. Rowling. And while we typically celebrate this day by indulging in homemade butterbeer, re-reading the books, and embarking on a movie marathon, we’d like to shake things up this year by shedding light on some underrated Harry Potter quotes that never made it to the big screen adaptation.

Understandably, the Wizarding World is just so big, and attempting to squeeze every written element into the films would be impossible. But tbh, there are too many iconic scenes that failed to make the cut. And while sure, “After all this time?” “Always.” and “I solemnly swear I am up to no good,” will always be classics, there is a long list of quotes in the books that have never been appreciated by theater audiences.

So in honor of Harry Potter and J.K.’s birthday, here are 14 magical yet criminally underrated quotes that we wish were in the movies:

1That one witty advertisement posted on the window of Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes.

“Why are you worrying about YOU-KNOW-WHO, when you should be worrying about YOU-NO-POO? The constipation sensation that’s gripping the nation!” — Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

2Harry’s unintentional sass moment with Professor Snape.

“Do you remember me telling you we are practicing non-verbal spells, Potter?”
“Yes,” said Harry stiffly.
“Yes, sir.”
“There’s no need to call me “sir” Professor.”
The words had escaped him before he knew what he was saying. — Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

3Harry lecturing Mr. Dursley about the importance of keeping up with the news. 

“What were you doing under our window, boy?”
“Listening to the news,” said Harry in a resigned voice. His aunt and uncle exchanged looks of outrage.
“Listening to the news! Again?”
“Well, it changes every day, you see,” said Harry. — Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

4Lee Jordan’s TMI Quidditch commentary.

“And it’s Johnson, Johnson with the Quaffle, what a player that girl is, I’ve been saying it for years but she still won’t go out with me —”
“JORDAN!’ yelled Professor McGonagall.
“Just a fun fact, Professor, adds a bit of interest—” — Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

5The Weasley is Our King song.

“Weasley can save anything / He never leaves a single ring / That’s why Gryffindors all sing: Weasley is our King!” — Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

6Harry putting Reeta Skeeter in her place.

“Congratulations, Harry!” she said, beaming at him. “I wonder if you could give me a quick word?”
“Yeah, you can have a word,” said Harry savagely. “Good-bye.” — Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

7Fred and George’s reaction to Ron getting appointed a prefect.

“You’re a prefect? Oh Ronnie! That’s everyone in the family!”
“What are Fred and I? Next door neighbors?” — Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

8Harry’s hilarious reaction to Ron and Hermione’s first kiss. 

“Is this the moment?” Harry asked weakly, and when nothing happened except that Ron and Hermione gripped each other still more firmly and swayed on the spot, he raised his voice. “OI! There’s a war going on here!” — Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

9The Marauders Map filled with Snape insults. 

“Mr. Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape, and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people’s business. Mr. Prongs agrees with Mr. Moony, and would like to add that Professor Snape is an ugly git. Mr. Padfoot would like to register his astonishment that an idiot like that ever became a professor. Mr. Wormtail bids Professor Snape good day, and advises him to wash his hair, the slimeball.” — Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

10Dumbledore

“I DON’T CARE!” Harry yelled at them, snatching up a lunascope and throwing it into the fireplace. “I’VE HAD ENOUGH, I’VE SEEN ENOUGH, I WANT OUT, I WANT IT TO END, I DON’T CARE ANYMORE!”
“You do care,” said Dumbledore. He had not flinched or made a single move to stop Harry demolishing his office. His expression was calm, almost detached. “You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it.” — Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

McGonagall reminding Harry that Hogwarts professors are badass.

“We shall secure the school against He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named while you search for this — this object.”
“Is that possible?”
“I think so,” said Professor McGonagall dryly, “We teachers are rather good at magic, you know.” — Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

12 Harry proclaiming that he will forever be a Dumbledore stan.

“Dumbledore’s man through and through, aren’t you Potter?”
“Yeah I am,” said Harry.
“Glad we straightened that out. — Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

13Harry wishing they had a dating 101 class.

“That’s what they should teach us here. How girls’ brains work… It would be more useful than divination, anyway…” — Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

14 The best Quidditch trash talk in history.

“Shame [your broom] doesn’t come with a parachute — in case you get too near a dementor.” Crabbe and Goyle sniggered.
“Pity you can’t attach an extra arm to yours, Malfoy,” said Harry. “Then it could catch the Snitch for you.” — Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

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