Sammy Nickalls
March 10, 2015 6:00 am

Last night was the season premiere of A&E’s “Bates Motel.” And to give you an idea, I had to use a thesaurus while writing this article to think of synonyms for “creepy,” because THAT WAS THE ONLY WORD ON MY MIND THE ENTIRE TIME.

Much like BBC’s “Sherlock,” A&E’s “Bates Motel” is a hip, modern twist on a classic. In this case, it’s a contemporary prequel to Alfred Hitchcock’s “Psycho”…and yeah, that’s about as eerie as it sounds. Starring Freddie Highmore as Norman Bates and Vera Farmiga as Norma Louise Bates, “Bates Motel” provides the backstory behind one of the most classic murder tales to date.

I’ve always been one of those weird, freaky people who is totally into the thriller genre and loves getting genuinely creeped out by a good movie. Unfortunately, I’ve learned over the years that once you find a good scary film, it rarely has the same effect after the first showing, because you already know what’s coming.

“Bates Motel” is a perfect solution for the horror-enthused. At 10 episodes per season (each episode lasting about 45 minutes), it keeps that creepy-crawly feeling going for a long, long time. And it’s received plenty of positive attention from critics to prove it.

After totally bingeing on the show on Netflix earlier this year, I was a little nervous that “Bates Motel” would go *too* far with their third season. The wow-factor of the show is the ebbing and flowing of the plot, as well as the gently-sprinkled references to Hitchcock’s classic. It’s a tease: Norman’s sanity become shakier and shakier…ever-so-gently, making us sympathize, in a weird way, with his character’s tragic decline. I was worried that this season would lose that gradual quality that makes the show SO addicting.

Luckily, I had nothing to worry about. The episode was, as always, awesome—but ULTRA creepy. For those of you who haven’t seen the series, but are intrigued, STOP HERE: spoilers ahead! This has been your one and only warning…there’s no turning back. Mwahahaha.

Norma and Norman’s relationship is disturbing to da MAX.

If Norma and Norman’s overly touchy relationship skeeved you out before, be prepared for some serious uncomfortable feelings this season. The episode opened with the two cuddling WAY too intimately for a mother and her high-school-aged son. And now, Norman’s going to be around her all the time, since he’s going to be homeschooled.

Norman’s anger at his mother when she told him to stop sleeping in his room was explosive. And when she gave in and asked him to sleep in her bed that night, he responded with:

*shudder*

Norman’s been creepin’ on other ladies, too.

Norman’s mother apparently isn’t his only romantic interest. Not only is there a new lady he’s been stalking through the hotel window (while she’s taking a shower…hello, “Psycho” reference), but he’s now dating Emma simultaneously.

So he’s dating one woman, flirting with another (did she REALLY need that lightbulb changed that badly?) and…well, the son of a third.

Norman is hallucinating again…and the hallucinations are getting bloody.

Even though we now know that Norman killed his English teacher, Miss Watson (Keegan Connor Tracy) back in season one, she made another appearance last night in the form of an ultra sinister hallucination, with her throat slit. And his response made it pretty clear that his psyche is not going to last long under this pressure:

Caleb’s backcue the scary music.

In prior episodes, we discovered that Caleb Calhoun, Norma’s brother, is bad news..

It seems as though Caleb may be here to stay for a while to cultivate a relationship with his son Dylan (who his also his nephew—the Bates Motel Twitter account dubbed him a “duncle”).

There’s no denying that this show is totally messed up, but hey, so was “Psycho”—and A&E has got us hooked with this ultra-freaky season premiere. Tune in at 9/8c every Monday, and get ready for some intense goosebumps.

Featured image via, gif via

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