This Reddit user perfectly explained why men shouldn’t rely on non-verbal “signals” to tell if a woman is interested
Someone on Reddit posed a seemingly innocuous question about dating the other day, and surprisingly, it turned into a teachable moment—the good kind. Reddit user Topvennie wondered: “What are some signs that girls give to boys that they like them that are obvious to girls but totally not obvious to boys?” Naturally, people chimed in with their take on the “signs,” but one person cut right to the core, explaining that there are no such thing as universal “signs,” because every woman is different.
"Ok ladies. It's not that men don't get the signals. It's that every woman's signals are different," Reddit user Shadowrangersf wrote. "One woman's flirting is another woman's 'Just being friendly.'"
We cannot emphasize this enough: There is no one-size-fits-all rule for engaging a romantic interest, and not every woman will express interest the same way.
“For every woman talking about how a guy missed the obvious signal, there is another woman talking about how her friendliness is mistaken for flirting. You laughed at his jokes because you are interested. Another woman laughed because it was a funny joke,” the Reddit user continued.
"I remember meeting this girl at a party and we started chatting for a bit, having a laugh, and I remember her laughing at one of my jokes and touching my arm," another Redditor OddyseeofAbe wrote. "I thought this was great she must be in to me. A couple of my friends come over and she did similar arm touches with them. I have heard girls before say that physical contact like that is a sign that they like a guy but for her it was just a part of who she was and how she interacted with people."
There is so much societal pressure on men to avoid rejection that they often rely on these non-communicative “signals” before they ask someone out. Since these so-called signals don’t often signify anything, straight-forward verbal communication is the best route to learn if someone is into you. Non-ambiguous verbal communication can be scary because it may lead to rejection, but if more individuals reject potential dates with empathy and the pursuer realizes that rejection isn’t the end of the world, we can stop relying on arm touches and simply ask someone out.