Prince George is apparently telling people his name is Archie, and we have questions

This is a case for the FBI (or maybe the British equivalent?). Prince George was apparently out with his grandmother Carole Middleton this week when a dog walker uncovered the royal’s secret nickname—for himself, at least. The young prince was playing with his little sister Charlotte near the Middleton family home in Berkshire when he noticed the dog and went to pet him.

“I was asked by a police minder not to take a photo of the children, which I didn’t, but George started stroking my dog,” the woman told The Sun. “Just to be friendly I engaged in a bit of small talk and I asked George what his name was, even though obviously I knew it.”

And George apparently told her his name is…Archie.

"To my astonishment he said, ‘I’m called Archie’ with a big smile on his face," she recalled. "I don’t know why he calls himself Archie but kids often play with their names and I think it’s lovely.

So, is “Archie” George’s secret nickname? Does he love playing pranks? Could he already be a staunch Riverdale fan? (And if so, is he following Archie’s escape from juvie?) Or did he just decide to say “Archie” because, we don’t know…he’s five? We will obviously be looking into this matter. Please clear our schedules for the rest of the day.