Forget the Apple Watch, the tech we want is this pancake printer

I’m sorry, if it looks like I’m crying, it’s because I am. Of all the technological advances humanity has made since the day of my birth, I can honestly say that the pancake bot that prints 3-D pancake art is probably the most impressive thing our species has ever done. This may sound reckless, but if you told me to light my smart phone on fire and throw it into the ocean in exchange for getting a hold of one of these babies, I’d be lighting the match before you even finished the sentence.

This blessed creation is the brain child of none other than a three-year-old girl, who asked her father to build one for her after mishearing him and thinking he was going to build one out of LEGOs. Any other parent might have laughed this off and let it slide, but Miguel Valenzuela is a true breakfast time hero and rose up to the challenge. It took a whopping four years to make, but now he has the Kickstarter for the project up and running, and it may only be a matter of months before I can start making all of the pancakes shaped like Andrew Garfield’s face that I always dreamed of eating.

It’ll come with custom designs already pre-set for your pancake-ing ease, and also an SD slot so you can incorporate your own designs. Honesty hour, guys, I am terrible with technology, but the way that they’ve set this up even a total incompetent such as myself can feel like a true breakfast savant. Also, if you contribute a certain amount of money into making this happen, they will turn your face into a pancake. I cannot think of a better way to be immortalized. In fact, we should stop having funerals for people altogether. Now that the pancake printer is a thing, we should mourn our dead in a much more fitting way, by eating pancakes shaped like their face.

(Images from here.)