I don’t have a best friend, and that’s totally fine

Today is National Best Friend Day, so shoutout to all the best friends out there! Hug your nearest and dearest and tell them how much you love and cherish their presences in your life. That’s what today’s all about.

But what about those out there who don’t have a designated best friend?  Like me. I don’t have a best friend.

Growing up, I know I had best friends, because tucked away in a jewelry box in my closet, I have many half-hearts from long forgotten best friend necklaces. I must have at least a dozen. As a small child, I had lots of best friends, or at least thinking back, my small child mind perceives that I had lots of best friends. This was how it was all through elementary school, and then middle school, and by the time I got to college, I had multiple best friends and we were inseparable. Until one day when we weren’t.

We don’t need to talk about the process of losing a best friend, because that scenario is different for everyone. For me, over the years I’ve moved away from every prior best friend,  and honestly, I really suck at communication. I’d go from seeing this best friend every day, to not seeing them ever because the distance was too great. We’d try and talk as much as possible, and then we’d try and talk sometimes, to talking rarely, to talking simply ~whenever~. There’s nothing wrong with drifting apart from a best friend like this.

For me, I’ve clearly lost best friends, but lately I realize that I haven’t replaced them with anyone. Why? I don’t know. Maybe I’m getting too old to make ~best~ friends, or it’s thought that at this age my best friend is supposed to be my significant other (which I do not have), or it’s simply the fact that being friends with people as adults can be HARD. It’s not like you’re seeing them every day at recess.

I look at all my friends now, and yes I have a lot of friends, but I know I can’t call any of them the “BEST.” I’d like to, but there are factors working against this designation like: they live far away in another state; or who I consider my best friend already has a designated other best friend; or I know they won’t give me the same honored “best” title; or they’re a dog (I’ve consulted with many, and no, I’m not allowed to single out a dog as my best friend).

Before you start feeling all sad for me about my lack of best friend(s), don’t. This is by no means something to be sad over! For me, it’s simply a fact of life. Like, I don’t have a best friend, just like I don’t have any tattoos or a jet ski. Sure, those things would be nice, but they’re not vital to my every day life.

The bottom line is that I still have friends. I have friends who I can text at 3 a.m. when I’m like 90% convinced that I’m dying, I have friends who will go to the movies with me, I have friends who will discuss Game of Thrones theories with me, and I have friends who will begrudgingly go with me to Ikea to pick up heavy furniture. They’re not my best friend, and I’m not theirs, but that doesn’t diminish our friendship in the least bit.

Maybe one day sometime in the future, I’ll find myself with a new best friend and we’ll be completely inseparable. For now, I’m happy with the friends I have. Even though none of them are my best.