Kenya Foy
July 24, 2016 7:30 am
Courtesy of Traffic Accident Commission of Australia

The human body is pretty freakin’ cool and all, with its tendency to perform tasks like repairing itself and even predicting weather changes, not to mention its uncanny ability to subsist on Mila Kunis’ “Black Swan” diet (I mean, you definitely shouldn’t do that but the fact that bodies can exist like that for even a while is super impressive). But as we all know, one thing the human form struggles with is surviving major car crashes. We’re simply not built for getting through that sort of physical trauma. However, if our continued habits of tailgating, daredevil lane switching or texting while driving should slowly contribute to our bodies evolving to adapt to harsh auto accidents, we’d all look exactly like Graham, the scary-looking sculpture of a “crash-proof human body.”

Brace yourself, guys. Graham is er, not a looker. Created by Melbourne sculptor Patricia Piccinini, the sculpture is on display at Australia’s State Library of Victoria. He’s super fleshy around the head, neck and upper torso, which means that along with defined shoulders, our beloved BFF necklace collection would become a thing of the past. And for some strange reason, he’s also well-stocked in the nipple department.

Courtesy of Traffic Accident Commission of Australia
Traffic Accident Commission of Australia

OK, so not to be totally superficial, but why does he have to look like that? *shudders*

According to the Traffic Accident Commission of Australia, Graham’s head is designed like a helmet, which reduces the likelihood of brain damage during an accident. His broad torso is designed in a more “airbag-like” manner, which allows the body to better absorb a forceful impact while offering increased protection to vital organs. Also, unlike the current human body, Graham’s knees bend in more than two directions, making them less susceptible to injury.

Courtesy of Traffic Accident Commission of Australia
Traffic Accident Commission of Australia

Crazy cool, right?

Obviously, the internet went bonkers over photos of Graham:

There’s also a really informative interactive website that explains a lot more about Graham’s anatomy. If anything, this should encourage everyone to adopt safer driving habits to avoid going down in history as the reason our descendants have such ugly mugs.

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