If there’s one thing we can all agree on, it’s that Michelle and Barack Obama are GOALS. They’re open about the fact that their marriage takes work, and their mutual respect for one another is palpable. In the most recent issue of Essence, which dropped November 15th, Michelle Obama dished on what a person should look for if they want a Barack-like partner of their own someday. And it all seems to come down to finding someone who’s secure with themselves…and secure with the fact that you’re secure with yourself.

“I think a lot of people don’t have a clear idea of what they should look for in a mate—and for a long time, I didn’t either,” she said. “What drew me to Barack was that when I met him, he was already a fully formed individual. From our very first conversations, he showed me that he wasn’t afraid to express his fears and doubts, or that he might not have all the answers.”


Finding a partner is rough (especially in today’s often nightmarish dating scene), but this advice is clutch to keep in mind if you’re currently on the market. Now, maybe Barack can share how we can find a partner like Michelle. Because let’s be real—she’s iconic.