Sydney Bucksbaum
March 15, 2018 11:56 am
TBS

When you look at Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, what do you see? A former professional wrestler who successfully launched a Hollywood movie career? Rock hard muscles and the whitest smile in the world? Kind eyes and a caring soul wrapped in pounds and pounds of the strongest man in the world? He’s pretty much all of the above, but when Conan O’Brien looks at The Rock, he sees major competition.

“I don’t see what you have that I don’t have, I’m being really honest with you,” he told The Rock on Conan. “You’re a good looking guy…I clean up pretty nice. You’re a big guy, check me out. I’m a big guy. I look at this and it’s like I’m looking in a mirror.”

Um, hold up there, bud. No one, and I repeat, no one looks in a mirror and thinks they look like The Rock. That man was literally carved out stone by the gods to show us mere mortals what true power and beauty really looks like. The Rock is here to put us all in our place, deflate our egos, and sometimes make us feel kind of bad about ourselves for how we could be doing more, working out more, eating better, if only we slept like five hours less a night to accomplish it all. And that’s not even getting into his philanthropic work! We definitely, under no circumstances, ever compare ourselves to The Rock. Because that’s just doomed for failure.

Unfortunately no one seems to have warned Conan of that, because that’s exactly what he did on Conan last night. While auditioning to be The Rock’s stunt double in his upcoming action movie Rampage, Conan pulled out all the stops to prove that he’s not only as good as The Rock, but he’s also somehow in better shape. He even makes The Rock feel his “pecs,” aka his breast, in a bit that you just have to see to believe.

The Rock serving realness with, “To be honest with you, I would think, ‘I’m gonna f*ck this guy up'” if he ever saw Conan coming at him is the kind of content we all need today.

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