Olivia Harvey
September 18, 2019 8:52 am

Although it’s been fun to see some of our favorite television shows and movies revamped for the 21st century—Men In Black, Full House, and Charmed to name a few—there are some properties that should be left untouched. And one such property is the 1987 classic film The Princess Bride. With rumors swirling about a possible Princess Bride remake, star Cary Elwes shared his thoughts about the idea—as did many others.

In Variety‘s recent profile of Norman Lear—who’s credited as a producer on a boatload of comedies for both television and film, including Princess Bride—Sony Pictures Entertainment CEO Tony Vinciquerra let it slip that some “very famous people” want to “redo The Princess Bride.”

Um…sorry, but have these “very famous people” ever heard the saying “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”? Because The Princess Bride certainly ain’t broke, and it’s in no need of fixing, as Elwes, who played Westley in the original film, pointed out.

“There’s a shortage of perfect movies in this world,” Elwes wrote in a September 17th tweet. “It would be a pity to damage this one.”

Diehard The Princess Bride fans of the world instantly recognized this as a paraphrasing of one of Westley’s famous lines, which originally goes, “There’s a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. It would be a pity to damage yours.”

Can you imagine a Princess Bride in which Cary Elwes isn’t Westley? Or Robin Wright isn’t Princess Buttercup? Or Andre the Giant isn’t Fezzik? Or Mandy Patinkin isn’t Inigo Montoya (“You killed my father, prepare to die”)?

We can’t. And we won’t! And neither will most people, we imagine.

Actress Jamie Lee Curtis, who married Christopher Guest (a.k.a. The Six-Fingered Man), refuses to live in a world where a Princess Bride remake exists.

As does Mia Farrow.

We’ll sling Princess Bride quotes Sony’s way all day, every day, if it means they’ll back off from the idea of a remake.

Sony, don’t be a Humperdinck. A Princess Bride remake is completely inconceivable, and you know it.

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