New Year’s Resolutions a la Bridget Jones

So, I’ll admit: I’m pretty tardy to the awesome New Year’s resolution party that’s been happening around here. This is mostly because I, like Bridget Jones, believe that you can’t really expect resolutions to start on New Year’s Day. Her explanation of why is far better than anything I can come up with: “Since, because it’s an extension of New Year’s Eve, smokers are already on a smoking roll and cannot be expected to stop abruptly on the stroke of midnight… Also, dieting on New Year’s Day isn’t a good idea as you can’t eat rationally. I think it would be much more sensible if resolutions began generally on January the second.”

So, now that New Year’s Day has come and gone, it’s resolution time. I hear the secret to these resolution things is accountability, and what better way to be accountable than posting them on the internet! Like Bridget, I’m also a fan of lengthy resolution lists, so here are mine for 2013:

Eat better. This is going to maybe make me sound like a hypocrite, since I made such a big deal about not dieting. But, it turns out there’s a fine line a large football field between “not dieting” and “eating half of every batch of brownies I make, the night they’re made.” I would like to get somewhere back to the middle of that football field, the place where I recognize that maybe M&Ms aren’t something I can eat for lunch, and where my daily Flintstones vitamin isn’t the only thing standing between me and scurvy.

Get up straight away when I wake up in the morning. Okay, I stole this one from Bridget, but it’s a good one. But this isn’t a productivity thing.  This is merely so I can get in and out of my gym before the high school girls show up. I know that at the age of 26 I should be over this, but somehow having to overhear conversations about who did what with Joey in the bathroom at winter formal throws me back into insecure highschooler mode, and I want no part of that.

Become conversant in some political subject. I know I said I was going to get better at this way earlier this year. I watched…one of the Presidential debates, so that counts for something, right? But seriously, I know nothing about things like the fiscal cliff, other than it’s not an actual cliff you can jump off (I think). I’m currently gaining political insight by watching The West Wing on Netflix, because there’s no better way to learn about politics than studying fictional politics from ten years ago. The fact that everyone on the show is a genius has made me want to actually sound smart when talking current events, so I’d like to start reading about those. If anyone has suggestions on non-biased-ish news sources, I’d love to hear them.

Spend less time rewatching the same TV shows over and over. There are some places where my encyclopedic knowledge of 30 Rock comes in handy, but when I’ve gotten to the point where I have most of the episodes memorized, I need to stop wasting time watching them yet again. Aside from maybe rewatching Gossip Girl to see if the plot still holds up now that we know who GG is, I need to diversify my TV watching. If  you have suggestions that aren’t Breaking Bad, Mad Men, or The Wire, which I keep hearing are good but I know I won’t watch, I’ll take ’em.

Read at least one book a month. Maybe even one that isn’t chick lit. Maybe one about politics!

Be open to having a functional relationship with a responsible adult. I also stole this one from Bridget. So, no more dating weird guys who are clearly not right for me, and maybe attempting to find a grownup with whom I have something in common. I hear that’s how this works.

Volunteer once a month. And not just because I hear this is a way you can meet guys, but because helping people is good. If you’re interested in doing some volunteering yourself, I’m a big fan of One Brick, which lets you sign up for volunteer opportunities that fit your schedule.

Floss. Because I’m tired of my dentist yelling at me ever year.

Turn off my computer at least half an hour before I go to bed. I’ll be honest. I”m not that into this one. I don’t have a problem with the light disrupting my sleep patterns or whatever, but the entire internet is always like “OMG turn off your devices or your brain will turn into a pile of mush!” So I’m going to try it. Plus I guess this will help with the whole “read more books” thing.

So, in the spirit of that last resolution, I’m calling that a list. Here’s hoping I can keep at least one of these.

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