My Dad Raised Me by Himself. And I Wasn’t Even His Child.
After being abandoned by her mother, Linden McKenzie shares how her non-bio dad stepped up to the plate.
About four in every ten children are born to unwed mothers — according to the 2022 U.S. Census Bureau. With statistics like that, it makes sense that you hear A LOT about single moms. But something you don’t hear a lot about, is single dads. Such was the case for 41-year-old Linden McKenzie, an upstate New York mom, model, and entrepreneur. Except in Linden’s unusual circumstances, the man she called dad wasn’t actually her “real” dad.
“When I was a baby, my mother met my stepdad, Bob. I never even knew who my biological father was until I was 19, when I met him briefly and then he disappeared again,” explains McKenzie.
For the next eight years, Linden felt like she had a “normal” family. “My parents had a baby, my sister, and my family finally seemed complete,” shares Linden. That lasted about two years. “My mother suddenly moved out and decided to live her own, separate life, which didn’t include us. She let my dad do the majority of the parenting.”
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A 10-year-old McKenzie and her younger sister suddenly found themselves motherless. “My mother moved on to have several boyfriends, relationships, and even other children. She moved away to Texas when I was a teenager. That was really tough on us. We don’t have a relationship now.”
The only saving grace for Linden during those formative years was the constant and steadfast presence of her dad. “We could always count on him. He never made me feel like I wasn’t his biological daughter. He came to every school concert, and had to be ‘the one’ for us when we went through those milestones young girls often do,” explains Linden.
For example, getting that first bra, that first menstrual period, the first trip to the gynecologist’s office. “He was the one who would run to the drugstore in the middle of the night to get us tampons. Not only did he take me to the gynecologist’s office when I wanted to go on birth control, he’d remind me to take it everyday. That may seem strange to some people, but to me, it was completely normal,” Linden laments.
While most girls look to their mother during those times, McKenzie doesn’t feel she was missing anything, as her dad was able to step in and fulfill both roles. “Here was a man who cared deeply about me, my health and my happiness. There were many things I wished my mother could have done, but looking back, he gave me all those things, plus a strong male role model,” she recalls.
“There’s so much to be said about a man who is willing to raise another man’s child willingly, especially when that child’s mother leaves. That’s something I’ll never forget, because it made me who I am,” the mom and wife shares.
McKenzie went on to marry the love of her life, and build a family — that now includes one biological daughter, and one, who’s not. “Just a few months ago, I decided to become a foster mother to another 12-year-old girl who needed a place to be,” shares McKenzie. “The way my dad shaped me made it easy to bring another child into my life who I could ‘save’ the way he saved me.”
Now, Linden has the pleasure of sharing Bob with her two daughters, who even sometimes accompanies them on trips to Disney World. “He loves his grandchildren with every ounce of his being,” she attests. “After recently retiring, he now devotes his life to being the best grandfather he can be.”
Linden also launched a successful candle company, and runs multiple other businesses. “Being raised by my dad gave me the fierce drive to become the strong entrepreneurial, loving wife, protective mother, and fearless woman that I am today. I could not be more fortunate for the broken road that led me to him.”