"Female porn watchers are 186% more likely to check out lesbian porn."

Genesis Rivas
Jun 09, 2021 @ 1:49 pm
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Credit: Martin-dm, Getty Images

I remember the first time I watched heterosexual porn and feeling uncomfortable because of how misogynistic, aggressive, and male-centric it was. I swore off of porn for a while because I thought it wasn't for me, but then I discovered lesbian porn, and it turned me on in a way other videos couldn't. While it was a great outlet for my solo sexy time, I remember feeling confused about what that meant for my sexuality and questioned if it was something I should share with my long-term boyfriend.

For some background, I am the product of two teenage parents, and they spoke about sex in only one instance-don't have it until you're ready to have kids (very much Coach Carter from Mean Girls vibes). Growing up this way made me a very private person when it came to my sex life and interests, so I kept the fact that I liked lesbian porn hidden from my boyfriend for a long time. It was isolating because I did have questions and did want to be open, but wasn't sure how to approach talking about it and feared judgment.

Then, I stumbled upon this TikTok video of a girl talking about women who not only watch but prefer lesbian porn, and I couldn't believe it. I immediately went to the comments section and felt comforted by all of the other straight women who shared that they, too, enjoyed lesbian porn.

As it turns out, after talking to a couple of sex experts, the comments section of this video isn't the only place where women felt the same. Ahead, learn why it's common for straight women to watch lesbian porn.

Is it common for straight women to watch lesbian porn?

More than you know! Shanae Adams, a sex therapist and educator, shares that "female porn watchers are 186% more likely to check out lesbian porn in comparison to male users." A recent PornHub report also shows that "lesbian" is the most popular category for female viewers of this digital porn portal.

Why do some straight women prefer lesbian porn?

There can be many reasons for this. Adams says one of the main reasons is because lesbian porn focuses on female pleasure. "Heterosexual porn focuses on the brutality of sex and the male-dominant pleasure at the sacrifice of female pleasure," she says. Similarly, lesbian porn tends to be more inclusive and sex-positive. "Porn shot by lesbian directors has a more realistic view on female pleasure and more representation," says Adams. 

Another reason is an interest in the fantasy of lesbian sex, says Marla Renee Stewart, sex expert for Lovers, a sexual wellness brand. "They may like it because it might be taboo for them and it piques their curiosity," she says. Then, there is the sensuality of it all. Lesbian porn tends to be more sensual and intimate, which many women find sexier.

Does enjoying lesbian porn change my sexuality?

In short, no. Stewart explains that porn is a performative act used for entertainment and arousal, which means it plays into sexual fantasies. And how we engage in sexual activity and fantasy scenarios doesn't always correspond, says Adams. That's because porn doesn't always translate well into real life. Stewart says most porn is meant to "titillate rather than emulate."

So, just because a straight woman watches lesbian porn doesn't mean she wants to have sex with women-but even if it does, that's okay, too! "You can want to have sex with men and still find lesbian porn intriguing," says Adams. Ultimately, "your sexuality is claimed by you and you only, so you can identify however you like," says Stewart.

Do I tell my partner I prefer to watch lesbian porn?

That is completely up to you! "It will always benefit you to communicate your desires to your partner," says Stewart. Telling your partner you prefer to watch lesbian porn might give you two something new to incorporate into your sexual life. "However, if it's something that you prefer to keep to yourself and have for yourself for your self-pleasure sessions, I think that's great, too," she says. "Sometimes, we can keep our fantasies to ourselves to please ourselves, and that's perfectly fine." Ultimately, what you choose to do in the bedroom is up to you and your partner. 

So, while growing up in a household where conversations about heterosexual sex was the norm, and made it difficult for me to understand my sexual pleasures, I learned that when it comes to sexual behavior, anything and nothing is normal, says Adams. Therefore, do whatever you want and whatever makes you feel good-I know I will.