11 very good reasons to be single forever

Comedy Central

Why is it that everyone acts like being single is some handicap we should all overcome? There are tons of very good reasons to stay single forever that don’t make you damaged or weird or unlovable. And the first person who says that you need a partner to grow old with so that they can take care of? Well, that’s not a very good reason to get involved with someone when you’d very much like to spend your time all by your glorious self.

In fact, being single is good for you.

It is! Being single is a sign that you’re good at being alone, and there aren’t many people in this big world that can say that about themselves. It’s not about being alone, it’s also knowing how much you have to give to another human being, because being in a relationship does mean that you have to compromise some things. In a good way, of course. It can feel good to make another person a priority. But it’s not the only way to have a happy, fulfilling, fun as hell life.

So before you let anyone talk you into settling down for a relationship, here are some reasons that being single is the greatest.

1You can eat whatever you want.


All. The. Time. You don’t have to ask someone what they’re hungry for or make concessions about brunch options. You just eat whatever you want, when you want it.

2You can have fun sex.


Relationship sex is good, too. But being able to hop around as many beds as you darn well please and have it always be fresh and new? That’s good stuff.

3You make your own rules.


In your house, about your life, about how many tacos should have. You do things your way, all the time.

4You can pick up and go!


Whether it’s just for a few months on a different continent or you decide to take a really great job offer somewhere else, you don’t have to consider someone else’s life. That’s sort of cool.

5You don’t have to be a plus one.


Oh, to get out of every bad wedding and office party that a partner will make you go to. No awkward conversations with an in-law or a coworker that even your partner doesn’t like.

6You don’t have to make holiday plans.


Likewise, there are no silly couple’s Halloween costumes or spending extraordinary amounts of money on holiday gifts every December. You can just treat yourself!

7No one lies to you.


Not that a good partner would either, but relationships sometimes get awful. You don’t have to worry about feeling like a fool when you find out your partner has been less than honest with you.

8Your bed is your bed!


You can go to sleep and wake up whenever you want. Also, you can pick what kind of sheets and blankets you like, without worrying that someone will be too hot or cold or uncomfortable.

9Mystery!


Every time you go out, you never know who you’re going to meet or go home with. That can be really fun and something that almost never happens in couple-life.

10You save money.


When you’re single, you end up spending all of your money on yourself. Yes, splitting rent or groceries can seem cheaper, but you end up saving money when you’re just one little person. Also, when you go out with your coupled-up friends, they might even pick up your portion of the tab since, you know, you only ate half of what those couples did! Suckers.

11Watching TV.


You can watch whatever you want on TV with no judgement — so if you’re really going in for a second Felicity marathon, no one will have to know. You can also keep up on your shows without having to wait for another person to come home so you don’t spoil it.

Basically, there are endless reasons to stay single. Do you.

newsletter illustration

Giggles in Your Inbox

!