Ashley McDonald
February 09, 2015 12:30 pm

One of the absolute worst feelings in the world arises from bad disputes with a loved one, whether that be a friend, boyfriend, parent, roommate, brother, sister. You get that nauseous feeling in your stomach; you’re unsure if the situation is even fixable (it is, don’t worry). You’re miserable, distraught, frustrated, stressed out—all you want to do is curl up in bed and eat some Ben & Jerry’s in between cries.

Depending on the actual circumstances, you’ll probably be able to work it out, and the two of you may arrive on the other side stronger and more secure in your relationship than ever. But it helps to know you’re not alone, and to remember some important words of wisdom when it comes to muscling through the pain of being at odds with someone you love. Because nobody on this planet enjoys an awful fight, especially with someone we care about so deeply, here’s some reminders that it’s going to be OK.

It’s definitely raining and it’s definitely dark out, but try to see the good in this. Maybe this fight needed to be had, because you both needed to see how much you mean to each other, or how important something that’s bothering you or the other person is. Sometimes, we have to disagree in order to better understand one another.

Because you’re not. You’re absolutely special and deserve someone who never, ever forgets it. Maybe they just need a reminder sometimes.

Maybe you’re all burned up and have nothing left to give; maybe you’re the one who needs to do more burning. Figure out which one you are and then share the light.

We expect a lot from our loved ones, but sometimes we need to remember to be our own heroes. That takes the pressure off of them, and reminds you just what a powerhouse you really are.

Don’t cry, you guys, don’t do it. You’re going to make us cry. But sometimes, you just need some time apart from the person you care about deeply, and that’s OK. Just remember, neither of you are really going anywhere. The heart holds all your love, and that never goes away.

Sometimes we are shamed for sharing our feelings. But you know what? We’ve got a leg up on everyone else, because constantly touching base with your emotions is SO healthy, for both your mind and overall well-being. Be proud of showing your loved one how you feel. Ultimately, it’s good for you both. That’s the starting place for coming to an understanding.

Don’t measure the degree of your errors, or the errors of your loved one. Instead, recognize what needs to be done in order to heal. Do it and move on.

It’s okay to feel it. Feel all the feels, even if they hurt more than anything. And then dry your tears, take a deep breath and sign up for a yoga class. Or hang out with your besties; call your mom; order yourself some cheer-up flowers. You’ve got this.

You’ll get through this and the hardship will pass. You’ve made it this far, haven’t you?

#Truth. We all have fights with the people we love. That doesn’t mean we love them any less. Maybe we just love them more.

When it comes down to it, a fight is just a fight. But if it’s raining, we’ll always share our umbrella. Caring trumps everything else.

Images , via via via.

Advertisement