I had #periodproblems on a first date, but I'm actually glad I did
It was the first date I had in a long time. Prior to this I was in a long-term relationship with my high school sweetheart and when college broke us up, I remained single and focused on my academics. While studying for my finals, a chat on my Facebook popped up. It was from a guy I knew from my childhood days — we used to ride bikes together every day in the summer and stopped speaking when I moved. Thanks to technology we were able to reconnect and pick up our friendship easily.
“You want to meet up during your break?” he inquired. I squealed on the inside, but I had to play it cool because nowadays most guys pull the “Netflix and chill” card and I’m just not here for that. “Sure, what do you have in mind?” I wrote back. I anxiously awaited his response, and when I saw “How about dinner and a movie?” pop up on my screen, my faith in men returned. I could officially be excited; I was finally going on a real date, two years post breakup. I told my friends, and they were excited for me. “Tell us allllll the details,” they said with a smirk. Guess they were hoping I’d break more than just my dating dry spell.
The day came for my date, and I decided to get ready at my friend’s house. Everything was going smoothly, besides my period making an appearance. I packed the necessary items and was ready for my date. My friend notified me that he arrived, and I quickly grabbed my purse and did my best Beyoncé walk to the car. We saw Sherlock Holmes, which was one of my favorite books as a child, and then went to a nice restaurant. We chatted non-stop throughout the date and even got a little silly in the car dancing to the radio. I was on Cloud 9 when we pulled up to the house. Mary J. Blige’s “Fine” was on repeat in my head, and I was feeling really bold.
I said my good bye and leaned in for kiss. He was totally digging it and I was super proud of my newfound dominance. I stepped out of the car feeling confident about the date, but my feeling was short lived as I closed the door behind me and turned to see a HUGE red spot on the seat. “Oh my god, is that me?!?” I thought. I was totally mortified — I had leaked in this man’s car, and we all know how most guys feel about their beloved automobiles. He pulled off without even noticing and I rushed into my friend’s house to share with her my embarrassing finale to my date. “Should I tell him? Do you think he will go out with me again?” I blurted. Of course, I had to say something — I felt so bad, and it was obvious who it came from. I was sure he’d noticed it by that point.
I was too much of a chicken to pick up the phone and call him. I was feeling so terrible — our date went so well, and now I had no idea how he would react. So I decided to take the millennial cop out and send him a text instead.
“Hey, I just wanted to give you a heads up that there may be a stain on your passenger seat. I just discovered that I had an accident and I’m very sorry, I’ll pay to have it cleaned if you need me too.”
My heart kept beating rapidly as I sat waiting for a response. I checked my phone every five seconds, and it seemed like it took an hour for him to respond when it was probably only 10 minutes. Finally a new message popped up, I looked at my best friend with wide eyes and she knew to remain by my side. I took a deep breath and opened up the message.
“Don’t worry about it, it’s cool! Things happen sometimes and it’s normal. I’d rather you have one than not at all LOL”
I sighed with relief and a smile appeared on my face from his wit. I felt so fortunate to have gone on a date with a guy who was that understanding. A moment that was horrifying for me at the time ended up setting the foundation for our relationship. I no longer felt like I had to hide being a woman like I used to in previous relationships.
We eventually moved in together, and I didn’t feel the need to hide my feminine products or tuck away my Nair. When we had our first child, the wet cicle stains on my shirt was just another badge of being a woman. All of this makes me look forward to our future golden days of wearing diapers while we sit in our rocking chairs, reminiscing about that first date.
It still amazes me how something beautiful came out of something so disastrous in my eyes. That embarrassing first date may seem like the end of the world when it happens, but years later when you’re able to laugh about it with the one who was there to witness it all, you’ll almost be glad that it happened.
Alyssa Bigbee is a Freelance Brand Strategist based in Philadelphia. During her free time, she teaches hip hop and acrobatics to students in urban areas. She’s also exceptionally skilled at doing the “Nae Nae” while Milly Rocking on any block. You can find her on Twitter and Instagram, or check out some more of her work here.