When we were all young and completely consumed with our friends, having just one best friend who really cared about you was all you needed in life. It was sort of like a status symbol: That one person was special enough to wear the title. Back then, if you didn’t care to expand your inner circle too far beyond that single BFF, you might have even been a little (fine, a lot) jealous if someone else came along and tried to pull a best friend poaching move. Like, how dare anyone try to get close to what you and your person had?
But once you reach adulthood, it’s time to be done feeling possess over your friends (we hope).
You realize that you can totally have more than one super-close bestie who’s seen you at worst and only wants the best for you.
However, should you encounter a friend who’s feeling particularly prickly over the way you’ve chosen to define the term “best friend,” you’ll definitely want to let them know that it’s entirely possible for little ol’ you to effectively and equally devote yourself to more than one bestie without slighting anyone in the process.
If all else fails, direct this misguided friend to our list of reasons why the idea of just *one* BFF is bullsh*t.
1It implies that having numerous BFFs makes each of those relationships weaker.
Um, no. In case you didn’t know it, your multi-tasking skills don’t just come into play on the job or at home. This idea of only having a single BFF suggests that your BFFships will somehow suffer if you have to split your time and attention between more than one. Juggling a bunch of besties can get hectic but it’s totally possible (and hella fun!) to do.
2It totally overlooks the fact that you’re grown AF.
That means choosing who you hang out with as well as how you refer to them. Whether it’s “my bestie,” “my BFF,” “my day one” or whatever, you’re an adult and no one can tell you how to define your relationships.
3There’s no limit on the number of best friends one can have.
There’s a cut-off point for a ton of things in life, like the number of products you can purchase when your favorite makeup brand has a blowout 2-for-1 sale. Fortunately, these types of restrictions don’t apply to best friends.
Unless someone uses the word “bestest” to describe where you fall on their hierarchy of friends, odds are you aren’t the only “best” in their lives. And even if they do, expecting a person to rank another individual above everyone else in their lives suggests there has to be competition among friends, which is *so* not cool (and also very Mean Girls).
4True friends aren’t bothered by titles.
Seriously, they don’t care about this title past the age of roughly nine. When it’s all said and done, is a real friend (best or otherwise) honestly concerned about these two words? Probably not. Actions go a lot further than titles, and as one of your many BFFs, they should already know how much you appreciate them — even if your friend group includes more than one bestie.
5Sometimes a single BFF just isn’t enough.
For those of you who insist on having only one BFF, tell us how you handle crises when your bestie isn’t available (which happens, ya know)? For those moments when your main pal is out of commission and unavailable to be there when you really need them to be, it’s nice — and we’d even say responsible — to have other close friends who can support you, give you relationship advice, or meet up for brunch.
6The idea of “one BFF” sounds low-key possessive.
We love it when people who love us express how much they care about us and look out for our well-being, but nothing is worse than a possessive pal who demands exclusive rights and access to you and your life.
Back off, lone BFF proponents. Sharing is caring, even when it comes to best friends.