All the different kinds of friends you'll have in a lifetime
Welcome to Besties Week! We’re kicking off the release of our first HelloGiggles book, A Tale of Two Besties, with an epic celebration of friendship and stories about friendship. Read an excerpt of the book, buy a copy, catch us on our cross-country book tour, and share your photos from our events by tagging us @hellogiggles #ATaleofTwoBesties.
In the meantime, join the party right here. All week long, our contributors will be sharing stories, essays and odes to their very own partners-in-crime. Read, laugh, cry (because you’re laughing) and share with your bestie!
I’ve always struggled with placing one individual in the coveted spot of bestie. It’s a tricky thing. Like Mindy Kaling says, a best friend isn’t a person, it’s a tier. BFFs shift around due to life events, circumstances, locations, and other factors. You may have multiple BFFs at any given time, each one of them holding an important place in your life, no more or less than any other besties.
In fact, it’s kind of an amazing thing to be able to have so many people that you’re close to throughout your life. From grade school to your first job, there are all kinds of besties that you’ll probably encounter. Here are the types of BFFs you’ll have in your life.
The Childhood BFF
This is the friend who grew up down the street, possibly your first friend ever. Maybe she;s the one you met in preschool or kindergarten. Perhaps they were the child of your parents’ friends. You had sleepovers, rode bikes, and played games together. They’ll always have a place in your heart, thanks to all the growing up you did together over lemonade stands and pizza parties and playground dates.
The High School/Teen BFF
This is the person you were closest to throughout middle school and/or upon graduating high school.You might have memories of long talks about your first real boyfriends or just hanging out on those long, lazy summer days in between grades. They had your back all through Algebra and Spanish, and during those growing pain moments. You may have gone separate ways after graduation, but you always make a point to see each other during breaks from school, vacations from work, holidays, or any reason you find yourselves back in your hometown at the same time. You’ll never forget them, and not just because their note in your yearbook told you not to.
The Hometown BBF
This might be the same person as your high school bestie, or maybe it’s someone you got to know after. It’s your closest friend who still lives in the place you grew up. Even if you moved far away, this bestie is always down to fill you in on the latest town gossip and which new restaurants are opening. She’s your first call as soon as you get back to the place where you grew up, to meet at your favorite local spot and catch up on everything that’s happened since the last time you saw each other.
The College BFF
Maybe you were roommates, maybe you shared a major, or maybe you met them at a party. Your College BFF is your first adult life BFF and they will probably be the most likely to stick around for the long-haul. You really bonded through the new social experiences of college, the times when you were finding your independence and learning other important life lessons for the first time. You’re still close after college, in spite of most likely winding up far apart geographically, and you make regular plans to meet up. Extra points for having informal reunions in your college town.
The Work BFF
The Work BFF is the one person in your office that totally gets you. You may not even have a lot in common outside of work, but you find camaraderie in silly jokes at work and scoping out the best workplaces, venting about your frustrations and celebrating your successes. This person is a confidant on all things work-related and a big part of the reason you are able to make it through all eight hours of the day. Even if you move on to another job, you’ll be in touch about the old days, and see what the new things going on in each other’s lives are.
The Hobby BFF
You met this BFF at a concert, a Renaissance Faire, or a comic book convention. You bonded with them over a particular person, place, thing, or event, but soon your friendship totally blossomed into something deeper and more amazing. Fandoms can be amazing places for friends!
The Sibling BFF
Unlike your friends, you don’t choose your siblings. But if you’re lucky, you might have a sibling or cousin or aunt who just completely gets it. You can talk about all the family stuff that no one else gets and all the weird long-lasting inside jokes that would be too hard to explain if you weren’t born into them. They’re the best for reunions and birthday parties and holidays where everyone is all gathered together. Even if you don’t live in the same house anymore, you have a bond that nothing can touch.
The long-distance-but-still-close BFF
You can go months without talking to this BFF and, the second you chat on the phone or have an in-person reunion, it’s as if no time has passed at all. You have such a strong connection that you jump right in to catching up, reminiscing over old stories, and laughing about inside jokes. You can spend up into the wee hours of the morning soaking up time with this BFF. After all, it may be several more months before you talk to or see each other again.
The Longest-running BFF
This could overlap with yoru Childhood BFF, or be someone totally different: this is the friend you have remained closest with throughout your lifetime. You share a bond like no other because you’ve gone through the milestones of life at each other’s side. You may go through periods of separation, but you always find your way back together, relationship totally unscathed. You’re both in it for the long term.
The Surprise BFF
This is a BFF that, by all appearances, you wouldn’t normally be close with. You have nothing in common, you didn’t meet naturally, and you don’t even see eye-to-eye on some things. You may have not even liked each other at first but some circumstance led to your continued involvement. You actually click for some reason. You enjoy spending time with each other. Now, you can’t imagine life without them.
You’ll probably be able to think of more to add to this list that fit your life. Sometimes they overlap! You may even have a BFF that transcends and dominates multiple categories (the MVP BFF). But these are just a few of the spectrum of wonderful besties that you might get to share your life with.
Kristin Carnes is an interior designer by day and a crazy cat lady by night. She was born, raised, and currently resides in West Virginia (not to be confused with western Virginia). Find her at her blog, on Twitter, or on Instagram.