Lisa Lo Paro
March 29, 2016 11:28 am
NBC

Most people want a life packed with excitement and would be happy to never be bored. I, however, am much easier to please. I actually want what most people would characterize as a “boring” life. I know that might sound pretty shocking, but let me explain. Here’s what I mean, and how a boring life would make actually me happier than a life filled with action and surprise.

I want a dependable partner to build a life with.

I’ve never been much of a dater, and while some people love the excitement and flutterings of a first date, more often than not, it makes my stomach seize up in knots. I’ve always been a relationship kind of girl, and have never been one to waste time with people I’m not over-the-moon about. That’s why I have always wanted to keep it simple: I’d like to find someone I can be myself with and build a life with them that I know will be solid. I don’t need someone spontaneous and exciting, I just need to know that I can count on my partner.

The best qualities I can ever think of in a partner are honesty, kindness, and loyalty. Yeah, I used to want the bad-boy, but now I want someone totally different — someone with simple expectations from life just like me.

I love boring, simple things.

Speaking of those simple expectations, my favorite things to do are pretty boring to most people: going to a movie, reading a book at home on weekends, taking random drives, and browsing bookstores. All my life, I’ve always felt that the simplest things make me the most happy, so I’m going to chase that calm, contented feeling. For me, it’s much more fulfilling than having a weekend chock-full of activities. Being able to slow down and enjoy the small things in life means the world to me.

I think of adventure differently than most people.

I’m pretty sure this is a symptom of getting older, but as I’ve grown out of my impulsivity, I’ve also started to think of adventure differently than I used to. I used to think it meant jumping off things — like planes or mountains — or saying “yes” to every single thing you’re asked to do. And while the person I used to be would’ve probably loved to go skydiving, now I think of adventure as learning about new things or places, challenging myself to experience things that make me uncomfortable, or even something as simple as exploring the wild of my own home state. It’s totally cool if you like the adrenaline rush of extreme sports, I’ve just learned in recent years that it’s not something I’m into.

I’ve learned to take pride in honest, hard work.

When I was younger, there was nothing that seemed more repulsive to me than a “boring” job: nine-to-five, with the same commute and the same environment every day — blech. But now, as I’ve grown up a whole lot and gotten less idealistic, I realize that taking pride in work is important, and it’s something I cherish now. Even if the job I have isn’t my “dream” job, doing it very well is a simple pleasure that I’ve become addicted to. Taking pride in the work you do is an uncomplicated, honest feeling.

While I want to travel, I want a home more. 

Back when I was 19 or 20, my ideal life consisted of never staying in one place longer for more than six months. Traveling the world was my dream; I wanted to see it all and write about it, take photographs, and be a nomad. Chasing adventure was something I thought I could never do without. Then I realized what I really valued was home, and family.

It may sound cheesy, but I’ve always devalued my home — I’m not letting myself do that anymore. I will never stop traveling, and will definitely see the world one day, but even stronger than the desire to see everything is my desire to truly belong somewhere.

I think it’s normal — healthy, in fact — to change perspectives as you grow up. Growing up doesn’t have to mean losing your sense of adventure and quest for something exciting; but it may mean that what excites you changes. For me, that meant embracing the life I really want: a “boring,” simple life filled with things I know will make me happy: love, stories, new experiences, and family.

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