We recently posted an article about online dating fatigue and how people are deleting their dating apps out of frustration. So if you are going cold-turkey with your dating apps and need a refresher course on how to meet people without relying on swiping, here are some tips from actual dating coaches Amy Van Doran and Sue Mandel, on how to meet people in real life.
1. Go for activities that you genuinely enjoy to meet potential matches who like the same things as you. Running clubs, intramural sports leagues, and improv classes are all activities that everyone could genuinely be passionate about.
2. Or, step outside your interest zone just a tad, to create the potential to meet someone who doesn’t exactly share your interests. If you want to date someone kind, try volunteering. If you want to meet someone alpha, try a sports bar. You get it. But don’t go to a monster truck rally ONLY to meet a monster truck fan, you should still go to things you would find fun regardless if you meet someone new.
3. Potential dates are everywhere that you are, so don’t be afraid to strike up a conversation, make a comment, or ask a question when the opportunity arises. Ask for directions, ask someone if they have the time, JUST TALK!
4. Practice “Power Posing” by assuming postures that reflect confidence. They increase our cortisol levels even when we are not feeling that confident. For more on “Power Posing” check out this TED Talk, it’s for more than just dating.
5. Ask friends to fix you up. If you ask five friends if they know one great single person for you to meet, that’s five dates. Don’t be specific about what you like in a match, just say, “Do you have anyone wonderful who I might like to meet?” Make sure to thank your friends. Matchmaking is hard work.
7. Don’t be afraid to go places alone. It can be easier for someone to approach you when you’re alone. If eating a meal alone scares you, take baby steps and try a solo coffee date.
8. And last but not least, make eye contact and be approachable!