Emily Baines
August 06, 2016 11:02 am
Comedy Central

Amy Schumer is not afraid to talk openly about herself and her struggles. It’s just one of the myriad of reasons we love her. The woman is a marvel.

So we were pumped when we learned Amy Schumer was writing a book, Girl with the Lower Back Tattoowhich will be released August 16th.

Well, Amy just posted a selection from the book on Goodreads!

It is an essay titled “My Only One-Night Stand,” which describes in detail how a fateful airport encounter with “a six-foot-two-inch strapping strawberry blond of about thirty-five years” helped Amy come to terms with a past relationship to a man who turned out to be gay.

The two met on a morning flight to Tampa, Florida, and immediately hit it off, despite Schumer describing her appearance at the time as a cross between “Beetlejuice — the Michael Keaton character” and “a tight end for the New England Patriots.” (We just love how she can joke about herself.)

“All the blood rushed to my vagina, and I smiled at him before immediately remembering I looked like Bruce Vilanch. (For those of you who don’t know who he is and are too lazy to Google it, just picture a barn owl wearing a blond wig.)”

Their connection was so strong (or Amy’s flirting game was so good) that she and the gentleman had a one-night stand ― a first and only for Amy ― in her hotel room later that night.

“I really needed a boost of sexual confidence during that time of my life…When you get older and wiser, you get your confidence from within, not from the person you are having sex with. But finding out someone I’d dated was gay at that moment in my life was giving me a hard time. I was having trouble feeling like a sexual being and was wondering about my own worth.”

Of course, Amy wants to make sure we know she doesn’t prescribe one night stands as ways to bolster self-esteem:

“Let the record show that I’m not suggesting one-night stands are cure-alls for broken hearts and low self-esteem — but sometimes they really can fix a specific problem. And even better, sometimes sex is just its own reward. No lessons to be learned. No agenda other than fun.”

We appreciate Amy Schumer for her candor, and can’t wait to check out her book later this month!

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