If a self-imposed sexual drought is in the cards for you, then cool! That’s between you and your body and whomever you might be dating. Listen, there are a million reasons a person chooses to not have sex that have absolutely nothing do with upholding the tradition of abstaining from sex until marriage or playing a round of petty mind games with would-be partners.
Whether you plan to abstain from the doing the do for an unspecified amount of time, or you’re just taking it easy while you work through some unresolved fears about sex, the good thing is that it’s up to you to determine how often (or not) you choose to have sex, even if someone else doesn’t understand your decision.
For starters, studies show that millennials are having less sex, so if you’re among that number, rest assured that it doesn’t necessarily mean something’s wrong with you.
Besides, there are some excellent reasons you may want to hold off on having sex.
1You’re not feeling so great down there.
Whether you’re getting over a yeast infection, a UTI, still treating a naggy case of bacterial vaginosis, or various other vaginal conditions, both you and your vag would be better off if you pump the brakes on gettin’ it in.
2You’re on your period.
Plenty of people are into having sex on their period, and that’s cool for them! For you? Maybe not so much, which is actually an excellent reason to curve any offers to hop in the sack until your flow subsides. Besides, you have enough on your plate, thanks to those awful cramps, bloating, general discomfort and/or crabbiness.
3You’re fine with masturbating.
You’re basically a real-life Charlotte from Sex in the City. Translation: You don’t need no stinkin’ human partner when you have Mr. Rabbit by your side. Actually, any sex toy (or your hands) will do as long as you can bypass the act of sex and get off all by your lonesome.
4You just don’t want to.
Who needs an excuse when you’re just not in the mood? There are a ton of reasons your nether region simply isn’t in the mood to be stimulated. But no matter the cause behind your less-than-lustful disposition, it’s totally cool to skip the sex when you just don’t feel like doing it.
5You’re not over your ex.
Some find that sex is an effective way to get over a breakup, but maybe you don’t operate that way. If you prefer having your ex completely out of your system before moving on to another sexual partner, don’t feel bad about waiting to do it when you’re completely healed and comfortable enough to do so.
6You don’t have protection.
Yikes — you’re getting hot and heavy with your partner when you discover that neither of you has a condom. Those birth control pills started making you feel bad, so you ditched ’em. In this case, holding off on sex until you can practice it safely is the absolute smartest thing to do.
7You’re too tired.
Yep, that’s it. It’s completely legit, therefore no further explanation is required.
8You just gave birth.
Need we say more? If you just brought a child in this world, you are a queen who absolutely reserves the right to turn down whatever doesn’t suit you or your recovering lady bits, up to and including sex.
9It’s been a while since you’ve been tested for STDs.
You’re revving to go, but your horniness comes to a halt when you come across a stat from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) that says STDs are on the rise. Or maybe you’ve recently had unprotected sex or are in between partners, which means it’s time for you to get tested for STDs. If this causes you to turn down sex for the time being, then congratulations on being a responsible human being who cares about the safety of yourself and other potential sex partners.