This is how long it takes couples to be “official”

Having the “exclusivity” talk is a huge step in a new relationship. It gives you and your potential partner a chance to make sure you’re on the same page and move forward with the relationship, or take a step back and part ways before things get too serious for one or both of you. But how soon is too soon to have the talk?

Over at Mic, Kate Hakala crunched some numbers to give us an idea of what that moment looks like in the average relationship, and what she found was really interesting. According to the studies Hakala looked at, including a Google Consumer Survey Mic conducted and a Time Out survey, she determined that the average couple is getting exclusive after about a month of dating.

So why are we opting for monogamy so fast? As Hakala points out, it’s not really that fast given the nature of relationships today. In a month, couples can be expected to have gone on about six dates, hooked up, seen each other’s homes, and will probably be communicating regularly throughout the day — we’ve all done the marathon texting sessions with a new love interest.

All of these things add up to a level of intimacy that makes going exclusive far more natural in the one-to-two month range.

Of course, not every relationship is the same, and plenty of people might opt to get exclusive much earlier or later. The timing is less important than having open communication and defined expectations. But if you’re seeing someone new and starting to feel a real bond after just a month, don’t feel weird if you suddenly find yourself on the brink of a real relationship. You’re actually in good company.

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