Galactic Guidance, a Zodiac Advice Column: How can a Cancer heal a broken heart?
When your horoscope app doesn’t have the answers, look to the stars for advice. And by that, we mean look to Gala Galactic, HelloGiggles’ resident zodiac advice columnist. If you’ve got zodiac questions, she’s got answers for Galactic Guidance: A Zodiac Advice Column. All you have to do is send your Qs to firstname.lastname@example.org. Happy stargazing!
I’m a Cancer and I’m going through a breakup. Do you have any suggestions for moving through this painful moment and healing that are specific to my sign?
I’m sorry you’re going through a tough time right now. Breakups are never easy, not even the amicable ones where both people are choosing to let go due to impossible circumstances. Cancers are tender babes who like to keep their tenderness close to their chest, especially when they’re feeling more vulnerable and less armored. While the time leading up to your breakup might have been spent seeking advice, intellectual support, and emotional validation, it’s likely that dealing with loss and grief has you isolating yourself and burrowing deep under the sand until the stormy waves of pain subside and fall back into a rhythm you can ride.
It’s okay to take some time to yourself. One of the common experiences of breakups is the strange and disorienting experience of remembering what it feels like to be a singular person in the world. This feeling of singularity, of wholeness in solitude that we are born with and carry within us all our lives, arrives holding hands with grief. For this reason, it can at first feel like a lack, an onset of great spiritual poverty. Taking time to yourself to separate the grief you feel from your re-connection with your solitude is important work. It takes personal self-reflective time with meditation and books and movies you love. Self-soothing.
Remembering and caring for your body will be valuable for you now, since so much of your energy might go towards holding the overwhelm of emotions in, causing muscle tension and re-surfacing chronic pain from past injuries. Take baths whenever you want and whenever you can. Have a day off? Take an Epsom salt bath at noon, why not? Who says you can’t start your day off relaxed? And here’s a bath tip: metal mixing bowls float in water. So make some yummy popcorn, get a book that helps with heart health, like The New Codependency, or a book that has nothing to do with this time, like The Fifth Season by N.K. Jemison, and go to town—bath town. Lavender oil is soothing, and so is eucalyptus. These are the scents of renewal, of cleansing, and of gentle hope. It wouldn’t hurt to go for a bicycle ride or a swim or a yoga class, either. Whatever works best for the body you have, whatever gets you to feel all the parts of the body you have—not just the ache of your heart. Also, endorphins.
Try to meal plan in a way that makes you feel taken care of instead of just indulgent. Cancers love snacks and treats and edible delights. They can be nostalgic about food and flavor and fall into bad habits when they’re feeding their heart instead of their bodies. I mean, listen, you deserve the chocolate ice cream or those delightful vegan nachos, you deserve pleasure in all forms. But, if you find yourself feeling as physically awful as you do emotionally after a day of binge-eating cheese, crackers, and rom-coms, it might be time to remind yourself that you love yourself with a fresh juice or a big salad or a hearty meal you put intention and energy into. Intentional meal prep is a signal from your hands to your belly that you know how to take care of yourself and put your well-being first.
As a Cancer, you might find the hardest time to handle is nighttime. Most people struggle with insomnia when they are in emotional turmoil, but Cancers are ruled by the moon and therefore have an overall intense relationship with night and dreaming. Whether you’re finding yourself unable to truly rest or you’re experiencing an onslaught of painful, visceral dreams, listening to sleep and relaxation meditations is a great way to go. These meditations help you achieve calm through assisted breath and prompted visualization exercises. There are plenty of great ones on YouTube with tens of thousands of reviews, so you don’t have to worry about getting secretly hypnotized to follow the dark lord. Unless you want to, that is.
All these practices of self-care and emotional regulation are generally useful, but for Cancer they can be hard to implement in moments of shutdown or retreat. So be extra supportive of yourself, whatever you’re able to do. And when you’re ready, reach beyond that protective shell and let the people you know love and support you through this difficult time. Friendship is grace, and the salve it offers is invaluable. You don’t need to protect yourself from the love you’ve earned throughout your life or from being seen when you need that love most.
My very best,