I was inspired to write this because I know I’m not the only twenty-something experiencing this and I’m a true believer in misery loving company. I recently moved back in to my parents’ house, as a full time resident, which I must admit was not what I envisioned while receiving my degree. I would be a terrible daughter/human person if I didn’t preface this by saying my parents are two of the most supportive, caring and amazing people in my life and ever. At this time in my life though, I would prefer said parents to continue their awesomeness through regular phone chats, with me being on the receiving end of those calls in my own (rented) apartment.
My story is nothing new. I graduated from university in the spring of last year, with a considerable amount of debt, interned for three months on a TV show in my pursuit to work in television and when that contract ended in the fall I was unemployed for almost five months until another TV contract came my way. All of these factors meant I was much to poor to afford anything, let alone rented shelter, and my parents kindly welcomed me back to the nest.
Since I’ve been back it’s become very evident that we all have to learn a new way to live with one another. The last time I lived here full time I was in high school, had never lived away, didn’t know how my next few years were going to unfold and I relied much more heavily on my mom and dad. I was also 17 and they still had a say in my actions and what they thought were right and wrong behaviors. Now, after four years away as an independent woman, the role of my parents, although still equally important, has shifted.
This shift has truly been a learning process for all of us, but for my sanity to stay intact I desperately need my parents to learn the following things:
• Yes, I spend way too much time on my laptop because I’m addicted to technology and pop culture. Please stop pointing out to me how much time you’ve calculated I’m on the aforementioned laptop.
• Yes, sometimes I stay out late and get home at an hour you deem unreasonable. I always text you and let you know where I am, I’m not trying to worry you, I’m just having fun with friends.
• No, I will not list everyone who was at the party I was at last night because after I do you will say “Hmm, I don’t know those people” and that will make me crazy because I already knew that fact.
• No, I’m sorry but I don’t want to watch a singing show with you because I can’t handle them anymore.
• No, I don’t know my plans for the evening at noon of that day. I more than likely know them 5 minutes before I’m about the leave the house.
• And No, I don’t need you to wake me up in the morning. I have an alarm on my phone that has worked to get me places on time for the past four years. Also I’m a ‘hit the snooze button’ type of girl and that won’t be an available option if you are my alarm.
After all is said and done, I know my parents are working on adjusting too and I’m fully aware that things I do just drive them bananas. This readjustment seems to be a predicament our generation has to face but in the end we are lucky to have the support of our parents. They allow us to get settled and on our feet so we can create the futures we dream of. Some days though this pretty cushy life seems annoying and tough, and a sister has just got to vent. So let’s band together, vent to our best friends, try to calmly explain our frustrations to the owners of the house, attempt to look at things from their point of view and in the end thank them for what they do. Let’s also work hard and save up the money to move out and start our independent lives…again.
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