In January, my dog Romina died when I was away on vacation. Her health declined very quickly (seizures, blindness, etc.) and over a matter of hours, there wasn’t anything that could be done for her. Mercifully, my parents didn’t break the news until I was back from my trip. To this day, we’re not sure what happened to Romina.
Losing my dog was, to put it briefly, painful. Even now, something will remind me of Romina and the grief will feel fresh. I’ve had a few feline friends pass away over the years, and it was sad, but it wasn’t shattering like losing my dog.
I don’t think anybody, with the exception of my parents (they sort of don’t count because they have to love me), has been happier to see me than Romina. I wish I could be as good a person as she thought I was, because, honestly I probably fall far below that great imaginary person.
If I could be the human equivalent of a dog, I’m pretty sure that I would be a saint by now. I would be a living miracle and altars would be raised in my honor. People might even comment on how much I look like Romina (except I don’t, but there definitely are people who look like their dogs).
When I look into a dog’s eyes, I want to be a better person. They think I’m so great, when in reality, I’m really not that great. I’m full of flaws and have sh**ty, petty thoughts about people. I dabble in fantasizing about the specific ways in which I’m going to wreak my vengeance upon those who have wronged me (‘Carmina Burana’ being the soundtrack). I’m not particularly good at empathizing with people (if you’re being stupid, I’m sorry, but I can’t bring myself to feel for you). I could go on, but I wont because there’s no point in listing all my issues.
Can you get any more all-around wonderful than a dog? No. They’re our best friends and they don’t judge us when we act crazy around them. They also let us dress them up in ridiculous outfits.
The World would be so much better if we were the people dogs think we are:
1. The amount of earnestness would be on the verge of being appalling.
2. I’d, and you too, probably spend a lot more time volunteering and being an overall better person.
3. Maybe we’d all be a little more empathetic towards other people.
4. We’d all basically be out saving the World.
Right?! It’s not necessarily that dogs think (or maybe they do, I don’t know if dogs think) that we have all these great qualities. Dogs think that we’re great, and I’d like to actually earn that admiration. For me, at least, that’s what a dog’s love feels like: admiration. Maybe it’s a God-complex, and that’s why I discern it as admiration, but it’s like: Here you are, thinking I’m so fantastic, and I know that’s not the case.
Basically, I want to be the wonderful person my dog thinks I am (I’m still buddies with a pug named Camila, pictured above) so that I’m not such a fraud.
I want to hear about the special dog in your life, comment below!