Olivia Harvey
December 28, 2016 11:24 am
FOX

If you are an avid HelloGiggles reader, you are well aware that Mercury is in retrograde and it’s bringing a lot of unnecessary upset into the world (as if we needed any more, ugh). During retrograde we should remain fairly stagnant and take time to reflect on what we’re worried about and where we are putting our energy. If you’re at all wary of the effects of retrograde, we have compiled a list of to-don’ts, if you will, to avoid like the plague during Mercury retrograde (December 19th to the 31st). And if you’re extra wary, it’s advisable to remain abstinent from these things during the retroshade as well – two weeks before, and two weeks after the retrograde period.

Such as…

Purchasing that new car/house/$500,000 oil painting of Beyoncé.

Now, don’t get us wrong. We really do want you to support the arts and buy that life-size Beyoncé painting. But, heed our advice and wait until next week – or better yet, next month – to do so. The planet Mercury rules over our interpersonal contracts, important for partaking in seamless purchases, understandings, and deal-makings. When Mercury throws it into reverse, these contracts all of the sudden have kinks in them where one party interprets a line one way, and the other party interprets the same line another way. This can lead to big legal problems.

Avoid the strife of having to go to court because you thought Beyoncé was supposed to be painted realistically, but your artist thought you wanted her abstract. Wait until we’re clear out of retrograde, and retroshade, for these big purchases to be made. That’s a cute rhyme. Basically what we’re saying is avoid mega purchases — they might get you into trouble.

Deciding to take that job in Chicago (or wherever is not where you are).

It’s a great job. Like, it’s really good. But if you can drag out your decision until the cloud of retrograde/shade has dissolved into blue sky, then please do so. The Old Farmer’s Almanac says, “Review projects and plans at these times, but wait until Mercury is direct again to make any final decisions.” The Farmer’s Almanac doesn’t kid around, people.

It really boils down to the idea of contracts again. If you take that job in Chicago during the retrograde, you might experience some complications at the beginning. But sometimes time is of the essence and your future boss may need you on the job, stat. If that’s the case, then just be extra careful about what you’re signing, and how your communicating your own wants and needs.

Starting that huge lifelong project of building the biggest Jenga castle ever.

We all have those huge plans knocking around in our heads that we need to put into motion. Now is not the time to do so. During retrograde, you’re more likely to get frustrated with yourself and others when things aren’t going the way you planned. If you start that Jenga castle this week, you’ll probably experience walls caving in, blocks going missing, and family members “just not getting what the goal is.” Or this might happen –

Instead, like the Farmer’s Almanac suggests, take time to review this plan and “review where you put your energy in your life.” Maybe this project isn’t the most pressing thing to do in your life right now. Focus on other things and wait until the time is right again.

Finally taking that crazy road trip you’ve been day-dreaming of all year long.

No. Just don’t do it. Not now, anyway. Mercury not only rules communication, but it also rules travel, so you know what that means. In retrograde, travel and all modes of travel are negatively affected. Expect your car to break down – maybe more than once. Expect any flights to be delayed or just cancelled outright. All things “travel” will most likely be problematic.

If you can’t avoid traveling during retrograde, then make sure you double check everything – itineraries, hotel bookings, flight times, car rentals, etc. Call ahead to make sure plans are still solid. Get your car inspected before road tripping across the country. Do yourselves a favor by being extra, extra careful.

It would be best to avoid these things and anything else that falls under their general umbrellas. As long as you steer clear from anything that feels like you’re taking a risk, then you should be okay. We’ve overcome retrograde pitfalls in the past, so we are more than capable of avoiding or rebuilding from those pitfalls now. Be safe! We love you!

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