There are a lot of lists in the Internet galaxy that suggest what we, adult humans with adult lives, should give up by the time we’re 25, or 30, or 40, or whatever age we’ve dubbed as “grown up.” Maybe these lists thrive because the Internet is obsessed with adulthood. Or maybe it’s because we all do a lot of things we really shouldn’t be doing or have habits we shouldn’t have and this is just one of the few things we universally have in common. Maybe. Or maybe we’re all just people trying to continuously better ourselves and reading a blog post about bettering ourselves is the first step.

As a 20-something human woman, I know that I have parts of my life I probably need to work on —and that it’s OK that not everything is perfect or in place. We’re still going to make mistakes, wake up in the morning with makeup on, realize we did some things last night while drunk that we’re not so proud of, realize we forgot to pay an important bill. These things happen! This here list is not to make you feel bad, or weird, or judged. It’s here to let you know that you’re not alone in your fumbling, and that we’re all working on making ourselves the best selves.

So, let’s do this. Here are some things we should work on cutting out before we turn 30 (or 40, or 50, or even 100).

Gossiping about your friends with your friends

Talking about a mutual friend with someone isn’t nice. It’s easy to fall into the gossip trap because maybe we’re annoyed with this friend and maybe it just feels really great to talk about them in a not-so-wonderful way to someone else. Or maybe you even feel like gossiping is just a way to bond. But in the end, there are better ways to vent — ways that don’t end up making people feel bad.

Putting off laundry for three weeks and being forced to go to the laundromat and take up all the washers

Or having no clean underwear and getting creative and wearing a swimsuit in lieu. Laundry sucks, but having no clean underwear might suck more.

Putting random things on your head while drunk

You’re at a party. You see a lampshade and Drunk You is suddenly overcome with this idea that wearing this lampshade on your head would be hi-larious. So you do it, and then the next day there’s a photo of you on Instagram with a lampshade on your head and you feel weird and regretful and also confused as to why you would put a lampshade on your head. Just don’t put things on your head that don’t belong there, trust.

Also making unwise purchases while drunk

Just, don’t do important things while you’re drunk. Don’t buy clothes. Don’t propose to someone. Don’t withdraw too much money from the ATM and lose it. Wait until the next morning when all the alcohol has been metabolized and you can trust you’ll make some solid life choices.

Not making an appointment with your doctor solely because making appointments is annoying

I GET IT, calling your doctor to schedule an appointment is easily one of the scariest and most weirdly frustrating adult errands in the history of errands. Because you have to have your insurance card out, and where did you put your insurance card anyway? You need to have a calendar, which is tricky when your calendar is on your phone and you’re ON the phone making this appointment. And then the only day you can go to the doctor isn’t available and you start panicking because how do people pull this off and why aren’t you one of those people? But you can do it. I believe in you.

Cleaning out your fridge only when you’ve noticed something smells and that smell is making you bummed out

Take some time to clean out your fridge. Like, really give it some love and maybe a spray-down with cleaning product. Not all the time, let’s not go crazy. But every once in a while, when it feels right.

Not wearing sunscreen

But seriously on this one, guys. Your skin and health is so important!

Not making some time in your schedule for “me time”

You totally need a day, an hour, fifteen minutes to just focus on yourself and yourself only. That’s totally reasonable and amazing for your mental health and you deserve it.

Holding on to friends who really aren’t very good to you or good for you

Letting go of people in your life is hard, especially when you feel obligated to be in friendships for the sake of it, or because you’ve been friends for so long. But if that friend isn’t there for you when you need her/him most, or if they’re not making you feel good about yourself, maybe re-evaluate the relationship.

Not taking makeup off before going to bed

This is how acne is born (one of the ways at least).

Putting off important e-mails because ugh, e-mails

Just get it over with in the morning, TRUST. You will feel good as soon you hit “send.”

Agreeing to plans you’re just not into and want to back out of the second you agree to them

It’s better to decline than make plans you don’t want to go through with. This is another one of those “but I feel obligated!” things that you totally aren’t (most likely).

And then flaking out on said plans

I’ve flaked out. You’ve flaked out. We’ve all flaked out. It happens, and it’s not really the most ideal situation. But you can prevent this all from happening by…YOU GUESSED IT. Not agreeing to plans you’re just not that into.

Drunk-throwing up in places you really shouldn’t be drunk-throwing up

One perfectly good place to do your drunk-throwing up is the toilet. Because it flushes away the evidence.

Buying a lot of really, really uncomfortable shoes

We’re all probably going to keep buying super cute shoes that are painful until we die a peaceful death, because many of us love shoes and are willing to put up with some discomfort in exchange for wearing cute shoes. It’s OK. But also have some comfy pairs in your closet.

Talking down about yourself

Don’t be so hard on yourself, OK? If you’re stressed at work or stressed with your relationship or stressed with school, just remember that you are a human person who is valuable and important, and giving yourself sh*t and making yourself feel bad isn’t helpful for anyone. Give yourself credit. Acknowledge the mistakes you make. Know that you are trying your hardest to meet your goals and be an awesome human, that is what really, really matters.

(Image via Paramount)