Nervous people have CRAZY vivid imaginations. But unfortunately, we often use said imaginations to weave intricate plotlines in our heads that generally lead to our great embarrassment / untimely demise / end of the world as we know it. In our minds, the littlest thing will lead to a bigger thing which will lead to a bigger thing and IT’S JUST A SNOWBALL OF NERVES, GUYS. The struggle is real. Here are all the things that make us embody our true form: a human ball of stress.
1. Waiting for a text back
It’s been 15 minutes and they haven’t responded. Clearly you offended them or totally annoyed them; you might as well smash your phone and never text anyone again.
2. Getting a random pain
“What is that twinge of pain in my leg? This has never happened before. Do I have a disease? I MUST BE DYING OMG.”
3. Buying tickets at the movies
Saying “you too” after the attendant tells us to enjoy our movie makes nervous people melt into a puddle of stress on the ground.
4. Ordering food at a restaurant
So many options! You THINK you want a burger, but then your friend orders a BLT, and what if you get food envy? And the bigger the menu, the worse the stress — like, seriously, screw diner menus that are a bajillion pages long.
5. Getting your blood taken
Even if you don’t have a crippling fear of needles, that tension before you get pricked is the absolute worst. Somehow, you totally forget that you didn’t die all the other times you’re going to get your blood taken. THIS TIME THE PAIN WILL BE UNBEARABLE. (It never is, but still.)
6. Driving during rush hour
So many people. Sooo many noises. That car in front of you just swerved; what if he’s drunk?! What if you crash?!? And now someone’s honking at you and you’re worrying about accidentally offending them while you’re fearing for your life.
7. Yellow traffic lights
Speaking of driving, there’s nothing like the confusion and panic that comes with an approaching yellow light. And somehow, whatever choice you made feels like the wrong one.
8. A cop driving behind you
He knows that you considered running that yellow light three hours ago. He knows. You go five miles under the speed limit just in case, until you wonder if maybe that will annoy him, and then go *exactly* the limit.
9. Getting your hair done
You always show up at the salon with several pictures of exactly what you want it to look like because you’re terrified of a hair disaster. And still, as you’re getting it done, you twitch a little with every snip.
10. Any phone calls
Texts allow you to prepare yourself, but who knows what will unfold during a phone call? Are you prepared for this?! And for unknown numbers, you assume the worst.
11. Passive aggressive tweets or statuses
“Is this about me? It probably is. Maybe I should apologize just to make sure.”
12. Feeling your face turning red
You’re talking to people and you’re getting nervous, and you feel your face flush, and you know everyone can tell, which just makes you get redder. . . the struggle is REAL, guys.
13. Any mention of an oven when you’re not home
“Wait, I baked cookies last night. Did I leave the oven on? THE HOUSE IS GONNA BURN DOWN.”
14. The dark
When you get home late at night to a dark house, you run like crazy to the light switches, because who knows if there’s something hiding in the dark? Like a ghost, or that scary demon thing in that movie you saw last week, or a serial killer.
15. Finding out you’ve been mispronouncing a word your whole life
“Wait, how often have I used the word ‘facade’ in my life? Why didn’t anyone tell me I was pronouncing it wrong?! Everyone thinks I’m an idiot!”
16. Seeing someone you didn’t expect to see
When you’re out on an errand, you hope and pray you won’t see a single soul you know, because you’ll end up replaying that conversation in your head for the next three hours.
17. Your boss asking to speak with you
Does she know you were on Facebook for ten minutes the other day when you were supposed to be working? You immediately start thinking of other places you could work, because CLEARLY you’re about to be fired.
18. That person not accepting your friend request immediately
It’s been 15 minutes. Did you leave a bad first impression? Maybe they hate you. . . ?!
19. Your own nerves
After a certain point, you start worrying about your worrying, because are you not living life to the fullest? Do you seem too uptight? But nah, you’re just being yourself, and ‘yourself’ is pretty great. Just take a deep breath and remember that everything’s gonna be OK. (But you’ll probably double check, just in case it isn’t.)
(Image via FOX)